Where did Susie go during the bombing? Everywhere. - Blake Woodman

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How do you wake up lady gaga? Poke her face

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Why was the Africanan boy hungry? Because food is hard to come by in Africa.

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what's gray, red, and goes over a 100 mph? a toad in a blender

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, it got hit by a truck.

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What do two Jews have in common? They both practice the same religion.

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Knock Knock I have a f*cking doorbell you asshole

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Two guys walk into a bar. The Third ones a duck

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Person 1: Ask me if I'm a truck? Person 2: Are you a truck? Person 1: No.

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why did the chicken cross the road? to get to your house... knock knock who's there the chicken

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why did the skeleton cross the road ? because it wanted too. lolz

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What's the difference between Al Gore and a slab of formica? Many things, most obvious being that Al Gore is a conscious being.

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what does pedobear get for christmas ? nothing he's the one giving love to all kids .

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Q: What do you call a black guy selling drugs? A: A pharmacist

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Parents were talking about a particular whore house and tries to keep it secret to their son. Father: Bob and I saw the house near the river, its a whore house full of prostitutes. Mother: Shhh! Our son is listening. The Son enters the room. Son: Don't mind me, I know that area. Both parents were angry: So you've been there!? Don't deny, you know! Son: Just because I know doesn't mean I've been there. I know the moon has less gravity but I haven't been there.

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why was the boy sad? because his penis was stapled to a coffee table

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OH LOOK I'M A SAILOR I KNOW NAUTICAL PHRASES! LIKE...... KNOTS AND MAST AND SHIP AND SEA AND STUFF

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Man walks into Malaysian Airlines "Hey, can I have the next flight to--" "This is our only policy! You pay the fare we pick the where."

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your mama so jewish ( fat ) she had to take up two seats on the plane to fly here in the end there was no chocolate left she was taking up the whole plane space.

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rocky is staring at us from outside...

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which one is easiest

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What's Black/White and red all over? Obama when he gets a little flustered.

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24

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Why was the pizza mad? Because he was going thorough a growth spurt and the testosterone got to him.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops