why did the chicken cross the road? he didn't make it

I dont have a girlfriend

roses are red violets are blue my dick is long longer then you

What did one ocean say to the other? Nothing they just waved

Did you hear about the guy who got his whole left side cut off? Now he is dead..

What do you call a black man with mishap-in head scares on the left side of his face and a 3rd degree burns on the right side? a very unfortunate guy.

Jane: The house is supposedly worth $ 6 million Jack: No way! The figure is made up.

One day i woke up, and found my wife dead on the floor. lol.

why did the old man lose his hair Because he had cancer and needed kimmo therapy

oh, you have a baby on board? I'll just drive into the the car next to you...

Why did the girl fall off of the swing? Because she didn't have any arms.

A black man walks up to a white man, and the black man says YO DIGGITY DAWG WASSAP FO DRIZZLE PLAYA BEEP BOBOTY BOP. And the white man stands there, confused as to what the black man said.

What did the camel say to the polar bear at the bar? "Uuuhhrrhrhhh"

Why did Jane's parachute not open? Because a plane hit her on the way down.

Girlfriend: Hey, you know whats the cutest thing ever? COMIC SANS Stabs girlfriend in the eyes.

women's rights

What do you do when the Cubs win the world series? Turn the xbox off and go to bed.

What did the worm say to the butterfly? Nothing, worms don't talk.

being sober in a bar fight

What's green, three feet tall, and can live forever? Definitely not Julie Andrews.

If Jimmy in New York has 2 apples, and Tommy in Denver has 4 apples, what is the mass of the sun? 1.989E30 kg.

I like my women like I like my coffee... 2 cream 1 sugar.

Why was the dog barking... Because billy fell down the well

do you wanna hear a joke school

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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