what's black and white? everything. i'm a dog

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Why can't the blonde dial 911? Because she's been bound and gagged by kidnappers who are holding her for ransom.

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What do you get when you fall in love? A guy with a pin to burst your bubble.

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What's the difference between a dead baby and my girlfriend? My girlfriend is alive and 19 years older.

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Haikus are easy But they don't always make sense. Refrigerator.

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What did one muslim say to the other muslim? Nothing, muslims are inanimate objects and can therefore not speak.

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Your mother is so fat that if she were to fall from a great distance she would hit the ground with more force than that of an average sized individual.

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a young cow was sitting on a bench until her husband shot her after that he said to the farmer 'i will get the milk than you cut the udders and then maranade them

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Roses are red Violets are blue Hop in the van or I will rape you

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Two black men walk into a Ku Klux Klan meeting. they are immediately lynched by the mob who hates them

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What did the broom say to the vacuum cleaner? "Your mom sucks."

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A black man walks into a store and grabs something off of a shelf. He walk briskly towards the door and pauses, looking sneakily left and right to make sure nobody else is around. He also looks and sees that the security camera is not facing him. Seeing as nobody is watching him, he quickly turns towards the counter beside the door and pays for the item with his own debit card, knowing that nobody can see him enter his PIN.

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What worse than finding crap on the road? Tripping over and landing on it.

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What sport was the man with one leg excelling in? Ass kicking.

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Q: One little blond girl went walking on her own. A: 17 didn't come back.

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what do you call a boomerang that doesn't come back? a stick

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I called your friend gay and he hit me with his fist because he was angry at me for using gay in a derogatory way.

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Q: what did the suicide bomber say after the attack? A:

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What's worse than losing your wallet? Having a miscarriage.

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a woman votes!

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Who lives in a pineaplle under the sea? Nobody but bacteria that will slowly eat your stomach.

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Steven Hawking walks into a bar

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A black man sits down to have a legal conversation with his state appointed attorney for the first time being arrested. They lawyer advises him to tell him the truth of exactly what happened. He proceeds to do so and is provided with excellent legal advice.

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What's the difference between you and a polar bear? I don't hate the polar bear

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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