Why didn't the door open? Because it was locked

How does a black man cut his hair? At a hairdresser

Why did the black man fall off the building? The building was one of the twin towers and the event 9/11 was currently happening and he saw one of the planes coming at him so he decided to jump to his misery instead because he thought it will hurt less, also he thought that if he waited for the plane to hit him there is a possibility that one of the wings may hit him right on the neck and his head will get chopped off and he wanted to die with his body completely attached.

I was walking down the street the other day and I saw this lady and suddenly: POTATOES!!!!!!!!!

Do you know the reason people like sleeping? It's because they have good dreams. Ooh la la.--

How do you make a baby stop crying? Make it smell its own diaper then, drown it in its own tears.

hating his life and his job, the man leaves work early and while he is in the elavator he has thoughts about killing himself after returning to his apartment he turns on the TV and grabs his gun out of the drawer. sitting in a chair with a gun to his head he looks at the TV and realizes that his office building has just been hit by a 747 piloted by Al-Quida members. Suddenly the man realizes that maybe he has something to live for and decides not to kill himself.

What did Tyrone Jenkins say when Obama was elected? Nothing. He is not a real person, but merely a hypothetically existent man used only for the portrayal of a lacking punchline.

Sorry Liz, his sodium levels are so bad that while he is drinking a lot, his body is not containing water, and while his pulse and breath is fine he is passing out from time to time, he is asking for stimulants Ritalin specifically, but I am not sure if his body could withstand that, I really don't mind to pry, but does he use Ritalin? I mean he chats a lot, but ADHD? I am just asking out of health concerns, not that I am a doctor, but I just worry... Flirty personality... More like a clown, he says he refuses to eat unless I breastfeed him XD. He is eating now though, solids work, never had a tougher patient, he will make it for sure.

What does a homeless man get for his birthday? 25 cents

yo momma so stupid she should probably be taken to a specialist as she may have a learning disability.

Roses are lamp, Violets are squirrel, I have ADHD, LET'S DANCE!

What is the difference between a Ferrari and 1,000 dead babies? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage.

Why did the black man give his seat to a white man? Because the white man had a leg injury, and the black man was being a courteous good samaritan.

Whats the difference between a Corvette and a dead bag of babies. -there's not a Corvette in my garage

Is everything funnier when u have a vagina.

Whats the difference between a pizza and a baby? Humans don't eat babies, other than a Cannibals because some tend to eat babies.

Why was the dwarf nicknamed The Anaconda? Because everybody loves a bit of irony.

Why did Helen Kellers dog run away? It didn't. She did not own a dog.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the black person

Why couldn't Hellen Keller watch TV? Because at 19 months she contracted what is believed to be scarlet fever which caused an acute congestion of the stomach and brain which caused her to loose sight and hearing.

A black guy walks into a resturaunt. he finishes his drink, graciously tips the bartender and leaves.

A man goes to the potty.

It was Valentines Day today, I thought I should get her something... I brought flowers to her grave.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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