You know what rhymes with school? Hell.

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5 - samios in a wheelchair.

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Why did people run from the chicken? Because they didnt want to get bit by the chicken

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What did the fish say to the octopus? nothing... fish cant talk.

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What's brown and Rhymes with Snoop? Dr. Dre

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Rhetorical question.

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How do you kill a black man? You drop a fridge on him.

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So I was standing in line at the grocery store and this little old lady let me cut in front of her. It was neat.

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why didn't the girl like that one guy? he hurt her, hurt her real bad.

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Ask me if I'm a grapefruit. Are you a grapefruit? No.

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Why did the hipster burn his tongue? He was in a terrible car crash in which the fuel tank exploded.

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Why did the butcher have blood on his hands? He murdered his daughter.

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Q. What is the fastest animal in the world? A. An Ethiopian chicken.

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How many black guys can fit in a minivan? Eight.

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Why did the black man almost go to jail? He rolled a 6 in monopoly, if it was a 7, he would've been sent straight to jail without passing "go"

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Why couldn't the 10 year old see the Pirate Movie? Because his weekend was busy!

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Far from, yet all organizations are money based and put capitalism in front of all, so if lets say, one organization, needs help from another, a money transaction is made, I play a role there, as a well... Diplomat, its not my title, but my title is something I cannot reveal to anyone, not even my wife, id be putting myself and people in danger, but since I master things such as hypnosis, I can well, influence people, this is how I can pull of favors myself. Not favors such as "kill that guy for me", but more like... In your case. "If you are going to kill the wizard, please let the rest be, I know they are good people"

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What did the mother say when her sons asked for a can of pop? No you have diabetes.

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Hey I just met you And this is crazy But I have Alzheimer's Hey i just met you

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A man walks into a grab and go restaurant and asks the man if he can stay, the man replies "yes."

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your mother

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What is the Modern Day slave trade? The nba

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So a person asked a blonde in America which was closer: the Moon or Canada? The blonde responded "Canada"

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Senior Sergeant Thomas the officer investigating your current rape and insect charges. Please open the door now.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops