What did Batman's mother say when it was time for dinner? Nothing, Batman's parents are dead.

Q: IMAGINE that your in a heart racing battle with a huge grizzly bear when suddenly a bird picks you up and carries you to china and leaves you on the adge of a cliff which then you are chased by warriors and are forced to jump off the edge. What do you do? A: Wake up

If Johnny can hold 7 bottles of Vodka in one hand and 6 cans of beer in the other, what does Johnny have? A drinking problem.

Why did the squirrel fall out the tree? It was dead Why did the second squirrel fall out the tree? It was stapled to the first squirrel Why did the the third squirrel fall out the tree? Peer pressure Why did the fourth squirrel fall out the tree? It thought it was a game Why did the tree fall over? It thought it was a squirrel Why did the postman die? He got hit in the head by four squirrels and a tree

What's worse than someone posting a number on antijoke ? Someone posting about what's worse than the holocaust

What happened to jimmy when he stepped on a rusty nail? He died of of tetanus.

whats a diffrence between a bench and a black person the bench is a thing a black person is a human being

Roses are red Violets are blue I have down syndrome duh dusfy druah

How do you make a dead baby float? Ice cream, root beer, and a dead baby.

a black man and his girlfriend are in a car, who is driving? the cop

a Polar bear in an Igloo.

A Chinese kid fails his math test.

why did the grandmom make rollerblades into cookies? because she had dementia

Roses are red Violets are blue... Violets are not blue they are actually purple

wanna hear a joke? yes

Why did the fish cross the road? Because the chicken was carrying an aquarium.

I like touching my boobs

Whats the difference between a crucifixion and a circumcision? In crucifixion you throw out the whole Jew.

Two muffins are sitting next to each other in the dessert. A hungry man passes, takes a look at the muffins lifts his shoulders and walks away. The next day a camel walks by and eats one of the muffins. The camel dies instantly, apparently the muffin was poisoned. The now not so hungry and lost man looks at the dead camel and noticed the zoo is almost closing now. So he left in a hurry, to cook for his family.

How do you hurt a clown? shoot it.

What is funnier than a dead baby? almost everything. there is nothing funny about a dead baby.

What's the difference between a baby and a watermelon? One is something I love to eat, the other is a watermelon.

What's the difference between unicorns and black people? That whole slavery thing.

-Knock knock! -Who's there? -Pizza. That'll be 20 bucks. -Here you go. -Thank you.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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