the little boy got in a ice cream truck he cant sit down anymore

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Why couldn't Paul see. He got stabbed in the eye by two mexicans

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what did the penis say to the vagina? SMACK SMACK SMACK

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why was the the taxi cab driver having a bad day? because he wasnt making very much money, didnt get alot of customers, some of which were extremely rude, and his entire family just died.

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How do you confuse a terrorist? Speak another language other than Arabic

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Q: What's funny about a gay man being raped by men for being gay? A: The man's personality

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what did the crocodile say to the fish? OMNOMNOMNOMNOM!! and then the fish swam away because of the the weird noise the crock was making...

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Where is the center of the universe? There is no center of the universe! According to the standard theories of cosmology, the universe started with a "Big Bang" about 14 thousand million years ago and has been expanding ever since. Yet there is no center to the expansion; it is the same everywhere. The Big Bang should not be visualised as an ordinary explosion. The universe is not expanding out from a center into space; rather, the whole universe is expanding and it is doing so equally at all places, as far as we can tell. In 1929 Edwin Hubble announced that he had measured the speed of galaxies at different distances from us, and had discovered that the farther they were, the faster they were receding. This might suggest that we are at the center of the expanding universe, but in fact if the universe is expanding uniformly according to Hubble's law, then it will appear to do so from any vantage point. If we see a galaxy B receding from us at 10,000 km/s, an alien in galaxy B will see our galaxy A receding from it at 10,000 km/s in the opposite direction. Another galaxy C twice as far away in the same direction as B will be seen by us as receding at 20,000 km/s. The alien will see it receding at 10,000 km/s:

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Who is Jim Wonderbread? A whorrible person

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Boston was having so much fun everyone was running and screaming

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wanna hear a joke? women rights. -ZombieUr

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Hey! That's mine! Give it back!

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my dick is like a bridge. i dont know why.

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Whats the difference between Justin Bieber and Lady Gaga? one of them is a women the other one is not.

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why was little johnny crying? he had frogs stapled to his face.

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knock knock a man walks into a bar what do you call a horse with no legs dave who?

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Q- Where did Sally go during the explosion? A- Everywhere!

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How is an orange like an airplane? They both have wings except an orange doesn't have wings

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whats thin, long and hard? A: a pen is

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There were 3 guys named Sean, Ryan, and Eye. They were best friends. However, things escalated when Eye slept with Sean's girlfriend and Ryan found out. Ryan felt he had to tell Sean that Eye slept with Sean's girlfriend. Ryan went up to Sean and said "Dude, Eye slept with your girlfriend!" Then Sean shot Ryan in the head before Ryan realized what he had said. Game Over

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People say the sky's the limit................................ but there's footprints on the moon.

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Knock! Knock! "It's open!"

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It's a man's 100th birthday, and as one of his last wishes he wants to go skydiving. Unfortunately, due to his crippling arthritis, he was unable to pull the rip cord on his parachute and plummeted to his death.

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Why did Zayne have no friends? Because he is retarded.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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