Q:Whats the difference between Jews and Pizza? A: Jewish people are humans, and pizza is a food

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What's worst than the finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust. What's worst than the Holocaust? Finding two worms in your apple. What's worst than finding two worms in your apple? Finding seven dead babies in a trash can. What's worst than that? Finding one dead baby in seven trash cans.

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An anorexic women walks into McDonalds

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What do you call an underground train full of professors? It's very unlikely that the passengers on an underground train would consist entirely of professors, unless it was a special service booked solely for the attendees of highly specialised lectures which required each audience member to have completed a professorship.

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Are those two people having sex? Yes, I think they are.

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What did Abraham Lincoln say to his slaves? Nothing, Abraham Lincoln had no slaves.

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What is about the size of a sausage, flesh-colored and looks like a penis, if you illuminate it with a flashlight on monday nights? - a penis.

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How to find if your overweight? Ask your friend to make a big clay volcano, out of baking soda and vinegar. While its erupting if you're too busy eatin five course dinner. FAT

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Knock knock Whos there? No one, your wife was just in a fatal car accident and died on the scene, so your kids had to walk home from school instead of being picked up. Your son Scotty was grabbed by the sexual predator 4 blocks from the school, and your daughter Sally tried to run and is now under the wheels on the bus going round and round.

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What did the man with a cold say when a jew walked into a bar? Hahaha you walked into a bar. What did the man with a cold say when a jew walked into a pub? AHH-JOOOOO!!!

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You must be Jamaican cause you have long dreadlocks and you are listening to Bob Marley

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A black guy, a mexican, and an arab are all in the same car, Whos driving the car? The black guy because he politely offered and his friends were happy to ride with him.

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Making jokes about 9/11 is just plane wrong.

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What's brown and rhymes with poop? Dr. Dre.

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My friend who's a chef was stabbed by his own kitchen knife, everyone said it would be in bad taste to joke about it.

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what did the lesbian say to the man? I don't like penis

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hey timmy, wanna go to Disneyworld?! tough. *10 seconds later* still no timmy

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why did the blonde fall down a mineshaft? Beacuse the rapist needed somewhere to hide the body

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There was a asian jew and a black man standing at a bus stop wht do you call the Freinds

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Why does Stuart go to Zu Bar? Because he deals cocaine to his fellow raving companions

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a retard walks into a bar a bruise appeared on his head

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Roger D. ASS , stops, has a ponder , and walks out of a s.t.i clinic ,without being seen

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What's the difference between a black guy and a white guy??? Just different pigmentation of their skin.

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A man walks into a bar... who cares what happens after that Charlie Sheen is winning and Osama Bin Laden is dead

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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