Q. why did the blonde stare at the orange juice carton? A. it said concentrate.

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A blind man walks into a bar. And a table. And a chair.

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A fish walks into a bar Fish dont walk

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What do you do if you see an alien landing? This depends entirely on the circumstances under which the landing takes place. It also depends on the observed nature of the alien,but given the high unlikelihood of this occurrence, one may be safe in the knowledge that he or she will never have to deal with such a mental state of stress.

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This is an anti-anti-joke.

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What does the funeral director say at a jewish funeral? Ashes to ashes to ashes to ashes to ashes to ashes to ashes to ashes to ashes to ashes to ashes to ashes to ashes...

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no jokes left :( ill try to make some more the ones with nude in my comments is mine

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What is the least racist animal? A panda. It's black, white and Asian.

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3 bears walk into a market. A little girl sneaks into their house. Meanwhile, people are freaking out because there are THREE BEARS in the market.

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What do you call two lesbians in a canoe? Women.

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What do you get when you put the head of a lion on the body of an eagle?2 dead animals and a fine for killing protected species.

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what has four wheels and opens using a key? -a trunk on wheels

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Why didn't the lolipop taste like anything to the boy beacuse he was aborted

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Why did the young girl fall off of the swing set? Because a man came up behind her and pushed her. He then picked her up, brought her home and fed her a nice three course meal and put her to bed. When she woke up she snuck out of the house and alerted the police.

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Bitch your as two-faced as Doduo

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What do you call a large group of Chinese people on Mars? An extraordinary feat for the Chinese space program and a historic day in human history, where a particular country has set up the first human colony on another planet and we have proven to ourselves that our race is capable of interplanetary travel and can accomplish anything if we set our minds to it.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding two worms

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Orange you glad I didn't say banana?

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What do fish and shoe laces have in common? nothing.

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Why can't Hellen Keller play the piano? She's dead.

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How did 6-year old dyslexic boy start his essay on soap? Sopa is shit...

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So a guy walks into a bar.... he gets a few drinks pays his bill and goes home

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Artichoke is a vegetable state induced by swallowing paint

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What group of people do the police target? Criminals.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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