This is not a joke

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. Get in the van.

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What's brown and sticky? A stick. What's brown, sticky and crawls up your leg? A homesick poo.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I hate rhyming, Vacuum, purple, zebra.

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A man walks into a bar. The bar is closed and the man is a thief. The police are promptly called in fear that the situation may become increasingly dangerous.

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What's the difference between Neil Armstrong and Michael Jackson? Neil Armstrong walked on the moon and Michael Jackson appeared in court several times under charges of child molestation

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If humans say YOLO what do cats say? meow.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Some poems rhyme, This one doesn't.

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69 is a number not a sex poshion

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What did the blonde say to the chicken? mmm, delicious

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What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick.

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What's the difference between Michael Jackson and Neil Armstrong? Neil Armstrong was the first man to WALK on the MOON. And Michael Jackson was a child molester.

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What's red and smells like paint? Red paint.

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What is not a crocodile? The teenage mutant ninja turtles

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whats worse tan loosing checkers getting lit on fire

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what did Sandra bullock say to Jesse James? I hate your fickin a**!!:)

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copy me and i will kill you

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Tic tac toe. I never met my father

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You know why Michael J Fox can dance like it's 1999? because he's a really good dancer.

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What's the best thing about The Pixies? Their music.

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Did you hear about the man who played the lottery? He lost.

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How do you make an electrician cry? You kidnap him and his mother, tie them both to chairs in your garage, and force him to watch you stab his mother repeatedly in the face while laughing and licking up her blood and tears. Then cut his arms and legs off, lock him in a cage with his mothers body, and go in there everyday and eat a delicious meal while watching him starve to death next to his dead mother.

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"Hey, why won't you let me through?" "These tickets are fake." "No they aren't. LOOK OVER THERE!" The guard turns around, and then turns back. Minorly inconvenienced, he arrests the man immediately, upon which he is sent to jail and anally raped multiple times.

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Why couldn't billy hear his mom on the phone? Because Billy is deaf.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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