Why couldn't the rich dumbass get into colledge? He couldn't open the door

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The town was so small. The ferris wheel was green.

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what did the doctor say to the guy with a bullet in his arm you have a bullet in your arm

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what's the difference between a baby and a watermelon? one is fun to hit with a sledge hammer, and one is a watermelon

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Why did the plane crash. its pilot was a loaf of bread.

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what did the asian father say to his son after getting a c+ on a test? son you are working hard and i know you will do well

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A family of five sit on a bench, the bench falls the family die.

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Want to hear a funny joke? Not really.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust.

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try this on someone: Knock Knock Who's there? Knock Knock Who's There? Knock Knock They will keep asking who's there while you laugh

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how many times did lucy's mom drop her baby on its head? none, her mom died giving birth.....

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what did the kid say when he didnt see the ice and sliped and broke his arm ouch that beep hurt

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What do you get when you cross a black man and a mule. Arrested.

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What do you call a middle ages man driving a van filled with children? Coach.

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why did dominic buy a new speaker on holiday because his parents died and his was at home

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Hey, I just met you... No, I'm your brother. You've known me for 30 years. You must have memory loss.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

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4 men walk into a bar... Don't jump to conclusions! They were gay.

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how do you make a plumber cry? you hit him in the face

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What's the difference between a bird? Both legs are the same, especially the left one

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A man is walking in the desert, alone and lost, when suddenly he finds a lamp. The man picks up the lamp and to his surprise, a genie bursts out of the lamp ! The genie says to the man: "Thank you, kind man! You have freed me from this prison I have been in for a million years. I am in your dept and will grant you three wishes." The man replies: "Wow, you've been in there for a million years and all you have to give me are three wishes?" The genie was really sad to hear of the man's lack of appreciation and flew away, leaving the man. The man eventually died of starvation and dehydration.

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There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge said, "Herp derp dur" to which Fridge's mother replied "Shut up, Fridge."

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Do you work at subway? Because I often enjoy eating there and i think the food is pretty good. I do not however eat there everyday because i might get overweight and get a eating disorder.

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Doctor, my husband tells me he doesn't like my figure .... That's irrelevant now, you've contracted a rare blood disease and will be dead within a month.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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