Q: How do you make three atheists cry? A: Kill their families.

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Did you see Stevie Wonder's new car? ....neither did he.

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Why doed Dorris suffer from incontinence? A weiner dog punctured her bladder.

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Why do Christian protest against gay marriage? They protest because they believe gay marriage is a sin.

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Why was the black man in prison? He was wrongly accused of a felony and the jury by whom he was tried was largely racist.

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What worse than the holocaust? Danny's.

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What can u see in the dark that u can't see in the light? Absolutely nothing

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. So was my son after I beat him to death.

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Why do Teenagers, mostly girls between the ages of 12-17 love Justin Bieber? Because he promotes himself worldwide and makes sure that girls know who he is thus creating a fan base that will be large enough to promote his career, which ensures him a safe financial future.

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What did the one man say to the other man? What? I don't know , I wasn't there, that's why I'm asking.

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There is a Mexican, American, and an Italian on a boat.They start to sink. All of them brought things from their country. The Mexican threw burritos over and said, "We have too much of these." The American threw american cheese over and said, "We have too much of these in our country." The Italian throws over pizza and says the same thing. They are still sinking. Then, the American picks up the Mexican, throws him over and says, "We have too much of these in our country."

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I always like to pack a second pair of pants, because if there's one thing my mother ever said to me it was 'please, I'm begging you - don't put me in a home.'

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Why the long face?" A few people laugh, but the horse, incapable of speech, does not. He is unfamiliar with this location and begins to panic. In his panic his leg is broken. He is put down shorty thereafter.

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What did the man do after he got in his car with out his keys? He started it up and drove Away

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There are two muffins in the oven. One says: "It's really getting hot in here!" The other one can't reply because it is already dead.

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Whats has no comedic value? A brick

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roses are blue violets are red i messed up so f... this s..t

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Today i started to think lucas was homosexuaI.. I am scared

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Why was the black man tangled in chains at the bottom of the ocean? Because he was a highly skilled diver and environmentalist who tragically entangled himself and consequently died slowly and painfully of suffocation while trying to save a whale from eating waste metal.

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Velcro. What a rip off.

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Why was Little Bobby sad? He just superglued Uranus to his forehead.

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Rebecca Black's career.

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Mr Whelk visited his doctor. His doctor put on a sterile glove and inserted two fingers into the man's rectum. "Does this feel all right?" The doctor asked "Yes" replied Mr Whelk. "But is my wrist broken or not?

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Ask me for £1000 Can I have £1000 No get a job

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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