Why was the boy crying? Because he had AIDS

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What happened when rudolf bucked Santa? Santa ripped his hooves off and started hitting his nose until it stopped glowing

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What's behind Chuck Norris' beard? His chin

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A man walks into a bar. He proceeds to begin his bartending shift.

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Whats black and cant read white paper? An African

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Q. What do you get when a banana and a person mate? A. The banana suffocates

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Why did little Billy fall of his bike? anwser: because a refridgator hit him.

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what did Harry Potter get for christmas? ... nothing his parents are dead !

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Why did the blonde switch the lamp on? Because it was getting dark

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On a deserted island in the middle of nowhere three women have just been in a horrible boat wreck. They are okay and alive. One is a lovely smart brunette. An appealing ginger. And a blond.. named Becky. They take shelter when one of them notices a shimmer in the sand. They pick it up to discover that it was a golden lamp. They rub it and a blue cloud of smoke consumes them. Then a magnificent Guinnie appears and says "You have awoken me from my 10,000 year encasement inside that lamp! I shall grant you 3 wishes to show you my sincere gratitude." The brunette wishes for a plane so she can fly home. The ginger wishes for a boat to sail back home. The blonde was lonely so she wished that the brunette and the ginger were back with her.

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Justin's hair

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What did the ocean say to the black guy? Nothing, it just shot him.

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One morning a man was frustrated at the dining table. His wife ask "What's wrong?". He says "I can't fit this stupid puzzle pieces together." His wife asks "What's it a picture of?" The man says "A rooster" The wife says "Honey, put the cornflakes back in the cereal box." The man says "no".

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hey, my names mark.

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You Obviously Lack Originiality YOLO.

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How do you silence a barking dog? You rip out its vocal cords.

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Whats worse than sour milk? 911. Whats worse than 911? drinking sout milk!

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What is Oedipus' favorite tv show! How I Met Your Mother

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What do you call a deer with no eyes? Blind.

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A Russian who dosen't like vodka

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what happened to the cripple after he got in a wheel chair? cancer of the eye

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why didnt Joe drive the tractor today? Because Joe doesnt have any arms or legs. Why doesnt Joe have any arms or legs? A) Because Joe is a potatoe

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Q:How do you know if you have a big enough oven? A: If the jew fits

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I kinda said I did not want to know, sooo... Want to meet up tomorrow? Like for realsies? In that case tell me first (then show me tomorrow as proof), your cough... Vagina, I dont care if its shaven or not, but does it have red hair?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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