Roses are Red Violets are Blue The end is near I want a beer

Knock Knock Who's there? Nobody cause your a loser.

When will racism end? When everyone's dead.

Whats red and hurts when you bite into it? A brick.

Whats black and white and red all over? A multicultural parade where they all are wearing red clothes.

If a man shouts in a forest and there is no woman around to hear him, is he still wrong? He could be, he could not be. It really depends on what he says. The greater concern is that he's shouting alone in the forest. Either he's in trouble or he has a major psychology disorder.

Whats the difference between an oven and a fridge One is hot and the other is cold

Why did the soviet plane crash? It was joseph Stallin

Did you know Hellen Keller Had a pony neither did she

Why was the baby crying? Because you repeatly hit it in the face with a brick, you sick freak.

How many Jews foes it take to screw in a lightbulb? 1...like... I'm confused that you... I mean screwing in a lightbulb isn't that hard.

Two muffins are being baked in an oven. One muffin turns to the other and says, "Man, it's starting to get really hot in here." The other muffin says, "MUFFINS CAN TALK?!"

The original joke: "WATCH OUT FOR THAT HOLE!" "WHAT HOLEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!" The anti joke, aka realistic edition: "WATCH OUT FOR THAT HOLE!" "WHAT YAAAAAAAAAAAARGHHHHHHHHH!" The ballon edition: Original: "Balloon! Watch out for that Cactus!" "What Cactussssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssss..." (leaking air you slowmo) The anti-joke aka realistic version: "Balloon watch out for that pointy soda!" "What soda *pop*" Moral: None of these where the least realistic!

Kid: mom what happens when grandpa farts? Mom: well son... Everyone leaves the room

Q: What did Batman say to Robin right before they got in the b\Batmobile? A: "Robin, get in the Batmobile."

What do you call a sheep on a trampoline? Disorientated.

Why does Mario wear coveralls? Because it makes practical sense for his full time job as a plumber.

Why did the virgin jerk until his hand was raw? He didn't have lotion.

How many ADHD kids does it take to change a light bulb? Let's go ride our bikes!

A man stepped on a nail. He died shortly after of lockjaw.

A blonde, a Brunette and a Redhead walk into a bar. They all buy a drink and talk about their days.

Why did the fridge fall off its bike? Because someone threw a little girl at it.

I see said the blind man to his def wife as the dog with no legs ran over

Why Didn't jeff go to school yesterday? He was dead.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...