- Anti Joke

What did the sushi say to the bee? Nothing, a piece of sushi can't talk and a bee wouldn't listen, stupid.

What has 2 legs and bleeds? Half a dog.

Pineapple.

What's sad about an old black woman being hit by a Porsche? She was my third grade English teacher, and had a huge impact upon my life.

What kind of bread makes pickles? Dill Dough

Why are children like books? They are highly flammable if covered in gasoline.

hey do you eat out a woman properly? you cook her first and then eat her. -jeffery dahmers

Why did the chicken cross the road? The screams were loud. It was just one big fire behind him. He and his fellow chickens had been trapped. They thought they were being freed... They thought wrong. The guards herded them in and then the heat started. The fires began to rage. His friends, his allies, his brothers, were falling dead, burning, beside him. He had to escape. He did not think, only acted. Lashing out at the guard, he knocked him down and ran. He ran and ran until he could run no more, and he still kept running. He could still hear his brothers' screams. He could still see their faces burning before his eyes. He reached the road, and finally stopped. He looked around. The screams had stopped. The heat had left his body. But then another sound came. Yelling. The guards. They were following him. He tried to keep running. But he just couldn't. He was finished. He fell on the road, sliding himself along as quickly as he could. He hadn't run this far to be caught by the guards. He stopped. He could go no further. He looked up and saw the blue sky, cloudless and free. The last thing he heard was a roaring engine. The guards never found his body.

Guess what my grandma told me yesterday.. Nothing she's dead.

A man decides to go hunting in the woods with a shotgun, he is going through the woods and a bear randomly pops out of no where, knocks him down and rapes him. So the next day he came back with an even bigger shotgun and said, "i am going to kill this bear" so he goes through the woods, the bear comes out of nowhere, knocks him down and rapes him again. So he comes back the next day with and even bigger shotgun and says, " i am going to kill this bear, skin it, and eat it" so hes going through the woods and out comes the bear, knocks him down, gets real close to his face and says, "you dont come out here for the hunting do ya".

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops

What does a bartender say to almost all of his customers? May I please see your I.D.

What did the boy do before school? Jacked off.

What has two legs, takes away your money, and causes depression? A Democrat.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

What is the difference between a duck. One of its legs are both the same.

Your dad is so bald, that a various number of people compliment him on how well shaven his head is.

When im invisible you cant see me, i know

How many light bulbs does it take to screw a blonde? 3.

Q: What do you do when you meet someone new? A: You don`t know and expect me to do so? Get a life!

Yo mamma's so fat it's a legitimate medical condition

What's the difference between and elephant and a banana? An elephant is grey.

Five Mexicans were driving down the motorway in a Ford. Must've been a Fiesta.

What's the difference between a duck? One of its legs is both the same.

Who are you texting? YOUR MOTHER.