What did the Blonde do when she saw train tracks? She walked over slowly, looked both ways, and crossed safely

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why did the snow man die? Actually it is impossible because it was an inanimate object.

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why couldnt the african child eat enough food? he didnt have a mouth.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread!

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Why was there no girl on the swing set? She decided to get off of the swings.

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a white guy walks into a bar luckily he is not an alcoholic and knows when to safely stop drinking and already gave his keys to a friend.

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why did the blonde put on a coat? because she was cold.

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A black guy walks into a bar with a dog. He is asked to leave because his dog is not on a lead.

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What is green and slow Grass.

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How old are you? 7

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Smoke Day, Every Weed.

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How do you make a firefighter happy? Give him a blowjob and 10 million dollars.

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In particle-joke physics, the antijoke is the extension of the concept of the antiparticle to the joke, where the antijoke is composed of antiparticles in the same way that the normal joke is composed of particles. Furthermore, mixing jokes and antijokes can lead to the annihilation of both, in the same way that mixing antiparticles and particles does.The result of antijoke meeting jokes is an explosion.[1]

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Knock knock. Who's there? Insurance. Insurance who? I'm sorry, sir; we can't fix your liver because you don't have any insurance.

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What do you get when you cross two things that are seemingly unrelated? A play on words.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she didn't have any arms.

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Roses are red, Violets are red, Why do I have a Virtual Boy?

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What do you get when you cross a Chinese man with a dog? A happy Chinese man and a pile of dog bones.

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What do a bicycle and a platypus have in common? They both have wheels, except the platypus doesn't.

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FIONN'S ECONOMICS GRADE

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Knock Knock Whos there? You You Who? Who You Oh im Jim.

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fhfhfjjil;tyjgfkileg ryj ftrgndfhuiltyjgn

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where is my tractor?

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A woman who owns a parrot leaves her home, forgetting that a plumber is scheduled to come fix her sink. A few minutes after she leaves, the plumber arrives and knocks on the door. The parrot calls out "WHO IS IT?" The plumber replies, "It's the plumber. I've come to fix the sink." The plumber waits for a minute and, seeing that nobody has come to the door, knocks again. The parrot calls out "WHO IS IT?" The plumber replies, a little more loudly, "It's the plumber. I've come to fix the sink!" The plumber waits for a minute and bangs hard on the door. The parrot calls out "WHO IS IT?" The plumber screams, "IT'S...THE...PLUMBER!!! I'VE...COME...TO...FIX...THE...SIIIIIINK!!!" Just then, the plumber clutches his chest and falls dead to the ground. When the woman returns home, she sees the dead man in front of her door. She opens her door to go to her phone and asks the parrot, "who is it?" The parrot replies, "WHO IS IT?"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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