Why did the gay man sneek out of the brothel? Because he was ashamed of his well paying reception job

A priest, a rabbi and a scientologist walk into a bar. They discuss their various religious viewpoints until the scientologist gets a call informing him of his mother's death. The priest buys him a drink. Then the priest gets a call informing him of his mothers death. The rabbi buys him a drink. The rabbi gets a call. The scientologist expects it to be about the rabbi's mother dying, so he prematurely buys him a drink. It was actually the lottery commission telling the rabbi he won 48 million dollars.

What do you call thousands of people running through london? The marathon

how did sally die? she starved because she cant get in to get the nuggets.

What did the Asian say to his racist friend? You're racist

a man walked into a bar, sat down and had a drink with his friends.

A couple elopes in Vegas. The next morning while eating breakfast the woman tells her husband she thinks it was a mistake, using her alcoholism as an excuse for her inability to make practical decisions. The man proceeded to cry and called his attorney to arrangea proper divorce.

What do you call an blonde, brunette, and a redhead? There has yet to be a definition for a group of people categorized by hair color.

Repeat after me: Silk, Silk, Silk, What's the square root of 465?

What is funny about civil and women's rights? Nothing, they are very serious matters.

Sarah Jessica Parker walks into a bar. Bartender asks her, "why the long face?". She tells him it's from her parent's genes.

Where was the Decoration Of Independence Signed? At the bottom.

What did the blind man say to his wife? -would you mind helping me upstairs, for I cannot see.

Q: What causes earthquakes? A: Your mother walking.

Yo mama so short, she developed a debilitating neck problem from having to look up at people when talking to them.

What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A jew is a human being who will understand and laugh at a joke, while a pizza will just sit there because it is only a delicious thing that people eat.

Q: What do you call a fish with no eye? A: Fssshh

What happens if you accidentally say your best-male friend's name instead of your boyfriend's name during sex? Nothing, they're both named Adam.

whats white and black, and red all over, kiren poping jacob cherry

How many pairs of underwear do I own? Seventy-nine.

The police shouldn't have cars. They should use skateboards and use flowers as their gun. When they catch a criminal in the act, they have to hug him before sending him to prison

What's the difference between a black man and a park bench? A park bench can support a family.

A black man, Jew and a Mexican go camping. A bear wanders into their campsite, but upon seeing them runs away because it's afraid of humans.

What do you call a gay kid, a horrible singer, and has long hair for a guy? Justin Bieber

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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