Why does the pope doesn't use this finger? (raise a finger) That's mine!

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It had a heart attack. Why did the baby fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the monkey

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Mom now that I am fourteen can I get a bra now? No Harold!

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why was Joe lying on the ground? Because he got shot.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What look likes a rocket, uses Mc Donalds wifi and takes off from Fairlawns Avenue Kevins House not instigating it was all Taggart

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Q:How do you sleep with Paris Hilton? A:You don't. she got herpes.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

How do you get a person to jump off a cliff? You push them.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why was Joe lying on the ground? Because he got shot.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why can't Stevie Wonder read? Clearly the only answer is because he's blind

thumb_up thumb_down -5

How do you stop a baby from crawling in circles? Pick it up and put it in a crib, like a responsible parent.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

what did the woman say when the guy told her he liked her christmas tree? thank you.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

1. The name of your street 2. The name of your pet 3. Your favorite activity 4. The color of your eyes 5. The number of shoes you own Now fill in the blank with the corresponding number to your answers. "One day I was ___3___ my dog when a pornstar named __(1)__ ___(2)___ asked me how many times I can ___(3)____ myself. I said ___(5)___ times and the juice that came out of me was __(4)___."

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why did sally fall out of the tree? Because sally was morbidly obese and uprooted the tree from underneath her subsequently causing her to splash violently on the ground. Why didn't sally get back up? Because the splash caused the earth to spin at 40000 rpm into the sun.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

whats cold, blue and hard? a frozen blueberry.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

CAOIMHIN JUST BE QUITE

thumb_up thumb_down -5

An Englishman, a Scotsman and a Welshman are all in the Great Britain Olympic squad,

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What did the red fish say to the blue fish? Nothing fish can't talk.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Roses are red, Violets are blue, i thought violets were violet. hmph.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What happened when the man fell off the boat? He went into the water and was viciously mauled by 5 alligators then ran over by another boat.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Awesome! I've just received my giftcode! >> minecraftnow.us << Awesome! I've just received my giftcode! >> minecraftnow.us << Awesome! I've just received my giftcode! >> minecraftnow.us <<

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What did the dog say to the rabbit? I quite liked Prince's first album.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Q: what did the man with no eyes get for Chrismas? A: Reading glasses

thumb_up thumb_down -5

The secret to McDonalds success is all their customers are to fat to leave

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Heard about the dyslexic fellow who sold his soul to Santa? That worked out OK, but Christmas was hell.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops