Woah, I mean if I was not like super high right now, I would totally hate you for that, you are what we call a charming asshole Nero, you can do that kinda stuff and completely get away with it, I feel like I should be really ashamed... So like does it work on everybody reading this? That would be wack, so much fun to do that.

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Once there was a giant Pringle. His family was dead, his wife committed suicide. So one day he was walking to work, when he met a genie! The genie granted him three wishes. The Pringle's first wish was to have lots of money. His second wish was to have his wife back. Before he could complete his wishing, he awoke in a hospital where he was hooked up to life support and was in severe pain. His wife wasn't really dead, but he was out drinking and accidentally walked across a motorway and got hit by a huge lorry.

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There is a tree. its still there. your still reading this, i dont know why, ok im getting sick of writing something that isnt even funny

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Q: When is a door not a door? A: Before it has been asembled or after it has been taken down and no longer maintains the physical form of that which a door typically has.

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If you spell "ChuckNorris" in scrabble, you get 22 points.

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Burrinbar Smells like incest anal sex!

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What's big, black, and impossible to swallow? A parking lot. Among many other things.

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Two jews walk into a bar. They drank beer and shot some pool and had a good time.

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I used to be addicted to soap, but now I'm clean. I'm still addicted to heroin, though. No chance I'm ever giving that up.

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why did the boat crash? a tomato was driving

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get hit by a car because he was depressed and contemplating suicide.

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whats worse than loseing your dog? getting raped by a clown.

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Ask me any question. Okay, what is your favorite color? I refuse to answer.

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Why wouldn't joey pay attention in class? Because he was being raped by a grizzly bear.

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What do you call a black woman that's blind and has 1 leg? Handicapped

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whats better than 1,000,000 dollars? 1,000,001 dollars

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How many flies does it take to screw in a light bulb? Two, but the real question is why there are two flies having sex inside a light bulb.

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knock knock WHO'S THERE?! ARE YOU A SEX CRIMINAL?! NO ONE WANTS TO DO THAT TO YOU MUM!

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Hey, you know what would be funny? A joke.

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You wanna hear what's totally out of this world? The moon

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why did the hobo want cancer so badly? he really needed a haircut

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There was a boy named Johnson. He was a happy boy who had a mother and father who loved. One day he didn't do his homework

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When is a Jewish persons bedtime? When the brain releases endorphins, causing drowsiness, which usually leads one to sleep.

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VITAMIN C!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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