What do a purple cow and a red fire engine have in common? Both like eating pizza on Fridays, except for the red fire engine.

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Whats worse than the holocaust? WNBA

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Pilot: We need to lighten the load of this plane Italian: I'll throw out these pizzas, there are too many of them in my country Mexican: I will throw out these tacos, there are just too many of them in my country The american stares in horror at the two men, the pizza and tacos were their only food and they were lost in the Himalayas.

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so a blind man walks into a bar, then a chair, then a table.

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I like my coffee like I like my women. Ground up and in the freezer

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The bold and unpredictable female bird escaped under the horror of the fearful fence of which enclosed the innocent chickens. As she wandered towards the nearby city of magic and dreams she approached by a large, empty road. A mysterious, shining object in the distant caught her eye. As she slowly to a shivering step towards the intereging sparkle, she was ran over by a car. EPIC FAIL LOL!!!!

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BTW ANders she is gone, read below, seriously! And your mother is ugly, but she is so kind to me, so ill be nice to her too... Seducing a LONE WIDOW ME 32 years she... 180 and always blushing around me? Thats gonna be hard... No seriously, I kissed her on the cheek the other day, she moaned... And she aint that old... looks like a old 40 year old. ANDERS! AAAANDEERS! CHATTERTON!!! Anyway, tell your mom, that way Ill just need to enter, kill you, and you know... make her feel like she is ... 77 again? Nah she is ahornbag so she must be younger, wont kiss her on those lips though ANDERSSSss because she smokes, the others? Sure, Ill take a pic of her squirting! From the guy that taught you how to make any woman squirt... YOu fucking asshole!

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What do you call thousands of people running through london? The marathon

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How did little Jimmy survive the 5 story fall? He didn't

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Why did the baby die? Because he was shot in the head repeatedly

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What did the Coke can say to the Pepsi can? Nothing it is a inanimate object and cannot speak.

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How many pairs of underwear do I own? Seventy-nine.

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what do you call the breaching of the anal cavity with a penis? butt sex

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How come Asian's are so clever? Their baby food is blended textbook paste.

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whats worse than finding a worm in your apple You thought I was going to steal an anti-joke didnt you squidward

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Why did the cow say moo? Cows can't say anything they actually make noises that humans interpreted as "moo"

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women's rights

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How does Batman's mom call him home for supper? Nothing. Batman's mom is dead.

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Your momma's so obnoxious, your dad left.

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Yo mama's so fat, she had a lap-band procedure.

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What do you call a white guy sitting on a bench? The NBA.

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welcome to australia. *kangaroo kicks you in the gut and you keel over, whereupon you are stampeded by wild dingoes and eaten by tasmanian devils*

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Why did Hitler kill himself? He saw his gas bill.

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How did Pablo get into America from Mexico? He drove here!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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