Why was the dyslexic cowboy crying when he came into school that day? He had chronic diarrhea.

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Why was the door opened? Because I opened it

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a tomato

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whats funnier than throwing a baby off a cliff cathcing him at the bottom with a pitch fork

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What happened to Jillian when she walked out the door? She got hit by a bus A. Knock knock B. Whos there? A. Not Jillian

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A guy walks into a bar and orders a glass of water. A few seconds later he drinks the water.

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What happens if you don't stop, drop, and roll? Astigmatism.

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A black guy and a Mexican are in a car, who is driving? They take turns due to the fact it is a long trip.

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a penguin biked to a bakery he walked in and asked for buns the baker said how many 12 or 13 the penguin said it don't matter I brought my bike

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You grand mothers so old she going to die soon.

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Two guys fight over a girl. The girl gets up from under them.

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What is the opposite of a joke ? Racism

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So a priest and a rabbi walk into a bar. They order some wine and have an enjoyable evening.

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What is small, cries a lot, and moves at high speeds? A baby stapled to a car.

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It's weird how two of the SAME jokes can get different ratings.

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ACT 2 CHAPTER 4 GEARS OF WAR 3 TICKER EASTER EGG.... MICHAEL VICKS HOUSE

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A man walks into a bar and sees a man with a big orange head. The man asks the bartender, "Why does that guy have a big orange head?" The bartender replies," If you buy him a beer, maybe he'll tell you." So the man buys a beer and gives it to the man with the big orange head and asks why he has a big orange head. The man says, "One day I found a genie and my first wish was to be the richest man in the world, my second wish was to be married to the most beautiful woman in the world, and for my third wish, I told the genie,'Ya know, why don't you give me a big orange head."

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What's disabled and red all over. The kid I hit with my car.

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What did the milk bottle say to the other milk bottle? Nothing. Bottles can't talk you silly goose.

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A. Knock Knock B. ... A. Knock Knock B. ... A. DING DONG B. Who's there? A. Me, I tried knocking first but you musn't have heard me, so I rang the doorbell.

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a man walks into the doctors office and says DOCTOR!, DOCTOR! IT HURTS TO BEND MY LEG!!! the doctor replies then dont bend your leg and the mans great pain eventually heals

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What do u call a white hourse with no ass Penelope

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A guy walks into a bar- he walks out of the bar because the beer was expensive and he didn't feel like getting drunk.

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Jack be nimble. Jack be quick. But Jack still couldn't out run that bullet.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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