A man walks into a bar. Since he was only moving at a slow walking pace, he was fine, no further events worth noting occured.

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Awesome! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> minecraftnow.us <

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Knock Knock Who's There No-one your not very popular

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Q: What is Fftp poort grtz gruxxyw? A: DYSLEXIA!

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What do you call a cat with a pop tart for a body and rainbows flying out of its butt? Nyan Cat

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How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? 9,405 licks (this may not be reliable I lost count since I kinda just bit it)

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PyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyongyangPyong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It's likely that very few people will read this.

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What did the white man say to the black bartender? I'll have a pint please.

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A man walks into a bar and says "ow"; he stepped on a nail sticking up through one of the floorboards. He then sues the bartender for a large sum of money because of the injury he sustained, and causes the bartender to lose everything he owns in order to pay off his debt.

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whats the diferrence between a bush and an old lady? it be wierd if a bush had an old lady.

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Roses are red My balls are blue Get off Unless You want too

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A grandfather clock fucked my bicycle!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? it doesn't matter, it got turned into KFC before it crossed.

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Your mom is so retard that she needs "special help" from medical professionals. :3 <33

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Two fuses wearing bombs for hats were sitting on a bench with their frayed feet dangling on the ground. A match was walking along and tripped, hitting it's head on the ground and bursting into flame. Luckily the fuses had finished lunch by that time and gone back to work. Unluckily for the match it died from burns to 80 percent of it's body.

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Q: Why was the little boy late for school? A: His face was stapled to a wall.

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Doctor: Why the long face? Elephant Man: That's not my face that's a tumor.

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A my dog was a rappa. He recorded a hit. But it had no lyrics, because he is a dog.

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Me:Oh wait, I got a joke! Friends:Oh boy, what is it? Tell us! Me:..my grandma died.. *Everyones silent* Some random guy:Oh haha, I get it! Me:Shut up, you have no friends. Some random guy: Oh........

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Kid: Mom I'm gonna dig a hole all the way to China! Mom: That's sweet but it's impossible dear. You'll get to tired after awhile to go any farther. Also, by any chance you did dig really deep, you would melt and die if you got the the center because the magma will kill you when you get to it. Alright son? Kid: What?

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Why did the cookie shader Because someone dropped it

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't. He got hit by a semi.

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Your mother is so dumb, that she had a very poor ACT composite score.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


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Anti-Joke Chicken

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