whats floppy and smells like trout? trout.

Just checked my Tesco burgers in the fridge and they're still within the use by date.

How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? That is not nearly as important as how to cure cancer so let's not worry about it.

Why did Suzie fall off the swing? She had no arms. ------ Knock Knock Whose there? Not Suzie

What colour is a black man in a freezer black

Where did Little Johnny go when the bomb hit? Everywhere.

Why couldn't the color blind orphan find his apple? Because he was also blind.

Roses are Red, Violets are Blue.... I hate your guts.

If a tree falls on a deaf person, does anyone care?

Why did the plane crash? The pilot was Hellen Keller.

My house is on fire I'll probably die posting this joke

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Pansies are purple, Nothing rhymes with purple.

A man realizes the whole time he has wanted to fly like a bird. His funeral was two weeks later

do you know who loves getting fisted? sock puppets

A man and wife were having a vacation when suddenly the man falls to the floor and starts having a seizure. The woman screams "Oh my God, is there a doctor in the house?!" Then a doctor appears and helps the man with the appropriate method of handling a seizure. The doctor says everything is going to be okay.

John Jacob Jingleheimer Schmidt has a really long name.

Why Tom is Gay ? Because brocoly didnt eat a mashroom .

why did stuart buy an ipad from the mall. because he wanted an ipad

Knock Knock who's there its black george washington.

Why is Stevie Wonder called Stevie Wonder? Wonder where I am.

What's stupid a light bulb.

Knock Knock. Who's there? The police, your entire family died in a car accident. ... ... The police, your entire family died in a car accident who?

How much cocaine did Charlie Sheen do? Enough to compromise his health and career

Your mom is so nerdy that she probably went to college, got her degree, then found a very successful job in a field that she finds interesting.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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