Why did Little Timmy eat Smarties before school? Because he was hungry.

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Why did jimmy fall off the swing? He had no arms or legs Knock knock Who's there? Not jimmy

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Have you ever tried grabbing a bottle of 7-up free and walked away with it? Moral: If it says its free, its free ffs!

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Would you like to go to my jinga party, if you do save the date 9/11?

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Noooooooo...

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My mom farted, she also has Alzheimer's, I also have Alzheimer's. Also pizza didn't like it

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When is it ok to drink urine? When you're Bear Grills

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what do u call a blonde in the libary? alexandra wallace

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To rape a duck

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Guitar. Guitar who? Violin.

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What do u call Lindsay Lohan fall from grace? Probably likely tragic and is also a very useful metaphor for The USA's projected path for global and economic superiority.

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what did the man write down? nothing,because at that time, his pen was out of ink, so he had to open his dest drawer to get another one

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Roses are red Violets are blue This poem sucks Because violets are purple

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Hollywood today: If you Like Dragonball Evolution you are gonna love this. Peter Linkoff a 16 year old boy, is being chased by his half brother Jack Ganonbad as Peter Falls into a hole, which contains a cellphone... ...THE LINK TO PLANET ZELDA! There he discovers that he holds the Link between earth and Zelda, and just then planet Zelda is threatened by The Evil Master Sword! A Meteor so destructive, that it sheer force could destroy the entire universe! *Random scenes going by so fast that you cant make shit out of them begins* "PETER LINKOFF YOU ARE IN DANGER!" *BOOOOOOM*" "BUT WHAT IF HE IS NOT THE DELIVER OF THE BOOMERANG!" Iiiit is said... Thhaat heee that wields the lasergun known as the wooden sword...<

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Whats worse then finding a worm in your apple? Watching your mum get sandwiched by two black guys...

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what sucks blows and gets laid in the closet. YOUR MOM VACUMING

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Sarah Palin's political campaign

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Why was the All-black Basketball team disqualified? Because they all died in a hotel fire.

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People are like trees. When hit multiple times with an ax they fall down.

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the street? A: Because that was the direction it was headed.

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a jew, a muslim and a christian all walk into a bar; because of the difference in religion im afraid such an event is unlikely to occur in the future.

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What do a rabbit and a plum have in common? They're both purple expect the rabbit

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what do you get if you cross a motorway with a wheel barrow? Arrested as a wheelbarrow is not a motorised vehicle, or even a vehicle at all and therefore it is an offence to cross the motorway with it, actually it is probably an offence to cross a motorway with anything now that I come to think of it

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I have a joke Who is better, Kobe or Lebron? Kobe. But I lied, that wasn't a joke.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops