Q:How many dead babies fit in a bathtub? A:It depends on the bathtub, but if all of them were the same size, babies also differ in size and sometimes shape. If all bathtubs and babies are the same, the number would be 1, because every baby will be as big as the bathtub.

Why didn't the TV turn on? Nobody switched it on.

how do you save a car from falling out of an airplane? I don't know.

Q. What do birds and a mouse have in common... A. Nothing there two different species

What did the frog say when it was attacked? Ribbit.

Q Why did the chicken cross the road A Nobody knows why because nobody is psych

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says 'Why the long face?' The horse says 'My alcoholism is destroying my family.'

What did the captain say to the priest? We're on a boat.

So there were these three guys on a plane, one with a ruptured hernia, one with a stomach infection and one with a raging case of gingivitis. Half way through the flight the pilot said, "unfortunately we will not it make to our destination... we are crashing." The three men then went to get the parachutes. they then say that there was only two. the man with the ruptured hernia picked one up and threw it out the door and pushed out the guy with the stomach infection. The guy with the raging case of gingivitis said, "why did you do that... we could have used that parachute!" the man with the ruptured hernia responded, "taco." and jumped out of the plane. the pilot then goes on the intercom and says," sorry. false alarm. we will not be crashing, please enjoy the rest of your flight."

what's a snake that has no legs a snake

roses are red violets are blue flowers come in many colors

i have a black man in my family tree. i am 25% african american among several other ethnicities.

A blind man crosses the street... he is hit by a car

Three girls are walking in the woods they see tracks one thinks it is a bear the other thinks it is a deer the last one thinks it is a lion They all argue till they get hit by a train and realized they were train tracks

Pretend you are in a box and there is no way out. How do you get out? You don't

Whats worse than failing an English test? finding out your now exgirlfriend has aids.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other... Uh oh. A car just ran it over.

A blind man walked into a bar. Quite literally.

See you later... Just joke I'm blind

What's worst than being stung by a bee? being stung by two bees. what's worst than that? The Holocaust. What's worst than that? being stung by three bees.

A man walks into a bar. He bumps his head on the iron and has headaches for a week.

Why was six afraid of seven? Seven was a serial killer.

How many filthy niggers does it take to screw in a light bulb? None, because I killed off all the filthy niggers.

What do you call a black priest? Holy shit.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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