Why did the man eat his own shoe? Because it was a tissue box.

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i was quite upset when my girlfriend called me a peodifile, what does she know, shes only 6.

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Roses are grey. Violets are a different shade of grey. Let's go chase cars. -Dog

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look at your sister now look at me now look at your sister now look at me you probably have now realized that you cant see me.

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Why were Billy's parents laughing at him? Because he was just diagnosed with cancer!

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Once upon a time a was born

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A priest and a rabbi walk into a bar. The priest has his papers but the rabbi is sent to a concentration camp.

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Roses are brown Violets are brown who the hell took a shit in my garden?

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why did the black man rape the little girl? no reason, its just a part of life. oh well

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A man walked into a pole barn oh wait I meant a pole bar so it actually hurt.

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Roses are red, violets are red, tulips are red, oh shit my gardens on fire!!!

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Alright so an elite group of Navy Seals walk into a mansion. They open fire on Osama Bin Laden and kill him.

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Knock knock. Who's there? We are members of the church of Jesus Christ of latter day saints.

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Knock knock. Who's there? The Gestapo.

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why Is the teen's sock crusty? he stepped in the glue that his little sister was using for her art project.

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How do you kill Justin Beiber? By stabbing him 38 times in the chest.

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Why was the boy in a wheelchair raising money to buy a basketball uniform? Because wheelchair basketball is a popular sport

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A red-head, a brunette and a blond are trapped on an island 10km from civilization. The red-head swims 1.5km's, but is to tired, so she swims back to the island. The brunette swims 3km's, but is too tired, so she swims back to the island. After watching the first two fail, the blond evaluates the situation and decides that she does not possess the swimming ability required to reach the 5km point (At which swimming back to the island becomes equally as far as swimming to civilization), and instead stays on the island and creates a signal fire out of bits of debris scattered on the island, getting rescued within hours.

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Why did Susie fall off the swings? She had no arms. Knock! Knock! Who's there? Not Susie.

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Why do aliens listen to relaxing music while they have sex? They like to cum in peace. \m/

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FOX News: Fair and balanced

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What do you call a black man that is on fire? A Man on Fire. The fact that he is black has no relevance in this situation.

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I admit I don't know what the future holds, but one thing I know for sure is that... Lance Armstrong has only one ball.

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A guy walks into a psychiatrist's office covered only in Saran Wrap. He asks the doctor, "The strip of metal teeth is missing from the box, so could I borrow your scissors?"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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