Yo mamma's so stupid she failed the SAT.

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Ask me if im a tree. Are you a tree? No

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What is funny about civil and women's rights? Nothing, they are very serious matters.

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chuck norris multiplied by zero equals zero.

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One a upon of time there was man named Cinderella. He was so mad because his name was Cinderella. The end.

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Why did the blond cross the road? She needed to get to the shop as she'd run out of milk.

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Why did Poppy lose at sports day? Because she had a heart attack and died.

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Why cant Helen Keller drive a bus? Cuz she's dead!

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Why didn't the octopus have any friends? Because they are antisocial creatures by nature. -Louis

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Cancer

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What do you call a Jewish dinosaur? Fossil Fuel

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A guy walks into a doctor's office and says: "Doctor! Doctor! You gotta help me! One day I'm a teepee, and the next day I'm a wigwam, and then the next day I'm a teepee, and then the next day I'm a wigwam again. The doctor says: Sir, we've been over this 100 times! You have stage 4 pancreatic cancer...

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What do you do when a blonde takes the pin out of a grenade and throws it at you? Take cover as there is a person close to you wielding an active grenade.

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So I was flirting with a girl at a bar the other day when this huge black guy walks up and says "Hey honey". I realized that I still had some un-addressed prejudices in me as he shook my hand, pointed out that it was a mistake anyone could make, and introduced me to a girl he had met at the college he works at.

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in superbad, why couldnt seth take off mclovin's face and wear it as his own? no one can. theyre fictional characters in a movie

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Roses are red. Violets are red. Daisies are red. WHY IS MY GARDEN ON FIRE?

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Why did Sarah fall off the swing? She got shot in the head by her drunk step-dad.

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I don't drink. I'm not 21.

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why did the black man fall down the stairs? he was blind, do to loss of vision from cancer

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What did the drug addict say to the doctor? I am a drug addict and am in need of help and rehabilitation.

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What do you call a man with no arms and legs laying at your doorstep? Matt.

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What do you call a man with no arms in the middle of the ocean? Mike.

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How many pairs of underwear do I own? Seventy-nine.

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whats worse than walking in to the doctors office and he says you got aids heaps of stuff can be worse but haha you got aids

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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