What did Jesus say to the jews? Fuck you.

What was going through the man's head on the 51st floor when the first plane hit? The 52nd floor.

You are so dumb that you receive poor grades in school.

What did the man say to the other man. Hi

Why was the little boy sad? Both of his parents died in a tragic car accident.

Knock Knock... Who's there? Nine... Nine who? Nine Eleven.

How many dyslexic people does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Filing cabinet.

What did the man do with the naked baby girl? He put some clothes on her and proceded to lay her down for a nap.

'How do you make a plumber cry? Buy him a belt for Christmas.

A man walk's into a bar with a monkey, I fotgot the rest of the joke. Your mom is a whore.

Roses are red. Violets are blue. I'm a fish out of water. Help me I'm suffocating.

A black woman was filling out forms at the welfare office. Under "Number of children," she wrote "10," and where it said "List names of children," she wrote "Leroy." When she handed in the form, the woman behind the desk pointed out: "Now here where it says "List names of children," you're supposed to write the names of each one of your children." "Dey all named Leroy," said the black woman. "That's very unusual. When you call them, how do they know which one you want?" asked the welfare worker. The Black woman said, "Oh, den I uses the middle names."

What's black and at the top of a burning building? A paraplegic

Why did the boy fall off of the swing? Because he had no arms

Why did Michael Jackson get so many nose jobs? He was incredibly insecure.

A man walked into a bar. He sat down, had a nice meal and went home relatively satisfied.

what did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? wheres my tractor

why did Dayrl win the wheelchair race? Because he had working legs.

A Japanese Nuclear Scientist goes to the swimming pool, and buys a ticket. He went to the changing rooms and proceeded to have a lovely bit of exercise, which helped him burn off the calories from his carbohydrate based luncheon.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It had gotten out of its coop.

roses are red violets are blue you smell like poo I F*****G HATE YOU!

a man was cooking a tortilla. what did he say when he dropped it while flipping the tortilla? oops i dropped my tortilla

Roses are red Violets are blue Some poems rhyme But this one doesn't.

what did the dog say to the mailman? "hey thanks for the mail" the mailman replies "your welcome"

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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