What are you getting for Christmas? Wasted.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Don't you just hate it when a sentence doesn't end the way you octopus?

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why arent guys and girls the same? Cause there different

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What should you do if you have a 10 inch penis? Subtly tell the world via an anti-joke

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What does a black kid get for Christmas? Your bike

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What's worse than a crying baby on a trans-Atlantic flight? A hungry lion on a trans-Atlantic flight.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

an islamic man with a strange bag walk into thr airport. he is probably heading toward his flight like any other person.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Q: What did osama bin laden say to the worker behind the gas station counter? A: May I buy this bag of chips?

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why did the chicken cross the road? Listen, it's a free country.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Stacey has no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Stacey.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What does a weasel and a naked college girl have in common? No clothes

thumb_up thumb_down +3

A working black man, Santa, and the Easter Bunny where walking down the street and find a penny, who picks it up? The working black man, Santa and the Easter Bunny take no payment for their work.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

A man felt a pain in his stomach. He went to the doctor.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

A man walks inta pet store looking for a dog. All he finds are cats.What did he end up buying. A weasel

thumb_up thumb_down +3

rose's are red violets are blue I have touretts blblblblblblblblbbl

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Who created Apple? Steve jobs.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Roses are red. Violets are blue. Why are VIOLETS blue?

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was trying to commit suicide through vehicular manslaughter and knew that the average human being would not be able to stop before it was too late.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Bill is walking down the street when a girl who had a crush on him 20 years ago sees him, goes up to him, and says, "I think I know you, what is your name?". Bill says, "Timmy," and keeps walking because he is an asshole.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

A teenage girl walks into a bar. She sits down and watches the TV up against the wall. The bartender walks by and says "Hello, do you have I.D." The girl says "No, I'm just here waiting for my ride." The bartender then says "Well I'm sorry to have to tell you this but you gotta be 21 or over to sit in the bar." The girl says "Okay, but is there anywhere I can wait that is safe?" The bartender asks "Why?" and the girl replies "Well, I've been hiding from my ex boyfriend. I just broke up with him an hour ago. He was very controlling and he is still not over me. So now I'm here waiting for my new boyfriend." The bartender says "What you have a new boyfriend already? Maybe that's why your ex was angry." The girl says "yeah, I know, oh look there's my ride. It was nice talking with you, have a good night."

thumb_up thumb_down +1

When life gives you lemons, take them. Free stuff is cool.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What song does the lady camel sing to seduce male camels - my humps my humps my humps my humps How did sergay the camel respond? -we dont know. He died a fatal death involving hippos in hula skirts, and flying guavas

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Roses are red Violets are blue I'm bad at poems... Nice t*ts

thumb_up thumb_down +1

How do get a cat to like you? Give it lots of love and attention

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops