Three midgets walk into a bar. The first one orders a beer, the second one orders whiskey, and the third one ordered water because all three of them had agreed that he would be the designated driver that night.

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roses are red, violets are purple, some poems rhyme, but this one doesn't

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what did the potato say to the apple nothing food can't talk

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I just had major Deja Vu... Cool, Brett. No one cares.

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When birds fly south for the winter they fly in a V formation. one side is always longer than the other. why is that? Because there are more birds on that side

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Why did the Jewish man stop to pick up a quarter off the filthy street? He saw a homeless man begging on the street corner and thought that he could give him the spare change he found.

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Its linked with the process of extracting uranium isotopes, but lets change the subject, with that said, I hope you can help me with some management advice such as the one you gave me, I will of course pay you.

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scenario: two teddy bears wrestling under water question: how many apples does it take to tussel with a potato answer: 96 becouse pillows dont eat chease

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What's the one thing America's got but the UK hasn't... School shootings

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How did the chewy cross the road ? it was stuck to the chickens foot.

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What do you call a Muslim flying a plane? A pilot you racist! Jk a terrorist

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Whats long and hard? a baseball bat

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Knock Knock Nobody Nobody who? Nobody, did you not hear what I just said.

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Q: What did the doctor say to his wife? A: Penis.

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What did the golfer do on his vacation? He played golf.

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Q: whats white and smells like shit A: my ass

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Why did the little boy fall off his bike? His mother threw a washing machine at him.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Can you sign for this package? Certainly

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What do you call Mexicans who go to jail? Criminals.

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did you hear about the little girl who won first place in her school's spelling bee? she was hit by a bus

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A man walks into a bar owned by horses. The bartender says, "Why the short face?"

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Knock, knock. Now before I asked "Who's there" I first opened the door as then I can see who's there without having to ask them through the door.

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What did the man with one eye say to the woman with one leg at 2 p.m? Good afternoon.

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What do you call a Muslim on the moon? An astronaut

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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