How do you make a firefighter happy? Give him a blowjob and 10 million dollars.

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Q: why was the man punched in the face? A: I did like him.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Some poems rhyme This one doesn't

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Yo mama is so fat, she needs to get serious about her diet, or else she might die of some sort of weight related issue.

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Why did the black guy buy a jug of grape soda Because he was thirsty

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A black and a white man walk into a grocery store the black man buys fried chicken and the white man buys vegtables. The men both have different opions and enjoy different food groups.

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That awkward moment when a sentence doesn't end the way you thought it gay unicorn

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What happens when you stick your hand down the jelly bean jar? The black one steals your watch.

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Q:Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? A:He slipped and fell. Q2:Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? A2:He was stapled to the first monkey. Q3:Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? A3:Peer pressure.

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what do you call a jew hanging from a tree? dead

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Knock Knock Whos there Boo OWWW YOU ASS WAT THE F*%^ (crying)

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Why couldn't Jimmy go bowling with the rest of his friends? His parents shot him.

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I like school Said no one ever.

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Sarah Jessica Parker walks into a bar. Bartender asks her, "why the long face?". She tells him it's from her parent's genes.

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How many hours of sleep did Jimmy get last night? Zero, because he has insomnia. Jimmy got fired from his job today because of his lack of energy and motivation due to his disorder. His wife divorced Jimmy because he can no longer support her and their two kids.

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What did the black man say to the Jewish man Nothing, because they were walking on the street and did not know each other

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Knock, knock. Who's there? Boo. Boo who? Don't cry, it's only a joke. It's not that, my wife and son were just killed in a drunk driving accident.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't, he was hit by a car. I lied about him crossing the road.

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What do you get when you cross a spider with a cow? A dead spider.

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What does 10 dead babies in a microwave look like? I dont know. I was too busy masturbating.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I am a cow moo

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What is worse than getting hit by a bus? 9/11

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What do you call a black man that is wearing a suit? Whatever his name happens to be

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yo mama is so fat, she's obeise

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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