roses are red violets are blue flowers come in many colors

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Why can't Michael J. Fox draw a perfect circle? Because it is humanly impossible to draw a perfect circle.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

How did the Muslim pilot die? He had a fatal heart attack while flying over the Atlantic and as a result the 300 passengers died by drowning.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Whats the best part about having sex with 25 year olds? There 20 of them.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

A blind man walked into a bar. Quite literally.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Knock Knock.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

why did stuart buy an ipad from the mall. because he wanted an ipad

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What's as hard as a rock? A rock

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Q: What did the boy say to the girl? A: Wanna go to homecoming?

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Knock Knock... Who's there? Nine... Nine who? Nine Eleven.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

1,2,3,4,5..what comes next? yeah you should know how to count

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Your moms so fat she struggles to to everyday tasks

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What's worst than being stung by a bee? being stung by two bees. what's worst than that? The Holocaust. What's worst than that? being stung by three bees.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What is round and bad-tempered? A vicious circle

thumb_up thumb_down +8

See you later... Just joke I'm blind

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What do you call a Gay leprechaun? A homosexual ginger man with a pretty green outfit.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Hey I just met you, and this is crazy, but here's a free drink, you'll wake up in my basement.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What did the black man say to the white man when the white man was drunk and naked on the roof dancing? Quit fucking around Brad and get off my roof or I'm calling the police because this is the third time this month.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why did Susie drop her ice cream? Because she got hit by a bus. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Susie.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Person 1: I'm really sleepy. Person 2: Then go to sleep.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

My Texting Convos: "Heyy!" "Hi!" "Watz up?" "nm hbu?" "Same here!" "Koolio!(: So wrud?" "Nothing. Just texting you!" "Yea! Same! I'm so bored! And tired!" "Ikr!" "Yupp!" *No one answers. When this is what you really want: "I love you soooo much!" "Awwwwh!<3 I loe you too!" "Do you wanna go out?(;" "YES!!(:" "ily<3" "iyl2<3" *convo goes on forever(: Moral: Purple tomatoes are books of yellow buttons on hands(;

thumb_up thumb_down +8

How much does a polar bear weigh? Depends on the polar bear and its dietary habits

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What did the jewish man say to the Irish guy at the bar? Are you Irish?

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops