Why did the tomato blush? It didn't, tomatoes are naturally red by colour.

What do u when life gives u lemons? U put them in your iced tea.

if u ever get arrested by cop, just tell the cop this: "No no officer, you got it all wrong. It was only a game. It's called RAPE."

Why is it so hard to find slim fitting clothes in America? Because not many clothing stores carry them.

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: This is actually a really good question which leads me to wonder why the farmer let the chicken out in the first place.

What's black and hangs from a tree? A tire swing.

why cant the blind man read brail? he has no fingers

Why did Hellen Keller drive off of the cliff? Because she is a woman.

Three men were on a plane. Oh wait. You probably already heard this one.

What did the boy with cancer, no arms, and no legs get for his birthday? Nothing he was dead.

Heard about the dyslexic fellow who sold his soul to Santa? That worked out OK, but Christmas was hell.

Gustavo Andrade

If you have three ice-cream cones, and you give away two, how many do you have left? Why would you give away your ice-cream? Eating it is the better option.

What is worde then swallowing a slipper? Swallowing a granny to catch the slipper

Knock Knock. Who's there? Banana. Banana who? I'm a talking banana; what more do you want from me?

why was the tricycle lonely? the mom back over the kid in the driveway.

Why shouldn't you try to pick up a live scorpion with your teeth? Because it could easily sting your face, or mouth.

why did the cow cross the road because pigs were not flying i had to write it hurts

Q. Why did the man get an email? A. Because he checked his inbox.

jack be nimble jack be quick jack is a parapeligic.....there's no need for more

How do you save stop your soulmate from dying of cancer? Shoot them on the head.

Why did seven eat nine? Because six was afraid of him.

Why can't hank swim? Hank is a rock.

I can't stand being in a wheelchair.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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