Q: Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? A: Taking the laws of physics into consideration, most likely nobody

thumb_up thumb_down +7

what do you call a girl that just took 15 loads to her face? sasha grey.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Knock Knock Who's There? Poop. Poop who? HAHAHAHAHAHA you said poopoo

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Little Johnny walked into class one day. The teacher announced their would be a pop-quiz on the declaration of independence. Johnny passed. (ic3)

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Q: Why does Billy get bullied at school? A: Because he has Down's Syndrome

thumb_up thumb_down +7

You are so dumb that you receive poor grades in school.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

why did the black guy fall off a cliff? because he was a zombie

thumb_up thumb_down +5

A little girl was curious about where people come from so she asked a very controversial question. Girl goes up to her mother and ask "Mommy, where do babies come from?" Mother replies "Ask daddy." Girl says "Daddy, where do babies come from?" Father replies "Ask the dog." Girl then goes up to her dog and says "Doggy, where do babies come from?" The dog doesn't reply because it's a dog.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What goes down well with whiskey? Pedestrians

thumb_up thumb_down +5

How do you know there's an elephant in your refrigerator? Look at your refrigerator.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What do you get when you cross a gay man with a chainsaw? A decapitated homosexual.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Why did the bear turn red? Because I fucking stabbed it!

thumb_up thumb_down +5

knock knock who's there? the paperboy the paperboy who? i lied, i'm a serial rapist, you should have looked through the peephole

thumb_up thumb_down +5

'How do you make a plumber cry? Buy him a belt for Christmas.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

A duck walks into a bar. The bartender asks the duck "What'll it be?" The duck doesn't respond because it's a duck and it can't talk.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Ask me if I'm a truck! Are you a truck?! No.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Whats more dangerous then a man with a gun? two men with guns.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Cripples are lame.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why did the middle-aged lady have a heart attack? Years of heavy smoking, alcohol abuse and lack of exercise had taken its toll on her body, causing it to age prematurely. @JWest

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why did James drop his ice-cream? He was mourning the loss of his mother to terminal illness so he threw himself in front of a train.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What do you call a bear in the rain? A wet bear.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

The chickens have become self-aware!

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why did the mailman deliver the wrong mail to people's houses? He's a bad mailman.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Q: How do you turn lights on and off? A: With a switch

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops