How do you help a one-armed man down from a tree? Wave.

roses are red, no one gives a shit, get back in the kitchen and bring me my chicken dips!

Why does everybody look at the foreign boy strangely? Because he was ugly

What did Batman say to Robin before he got in the car? Robin, get in the car.

What make's a constuction worker drop's his hammer? MC Hammer moves.

whats the difference between a frog and a toad ones a frog

Whats hard and long and used to penetrate women? A hypodermic needle.

What do you get when you cross an elephant with a giraffe? A really f*cked up hybrid.

Variants: :) I will always assist you in whatever you want. :( I want to kill you all by myself! Sense? Non? Fuck? Mind? Fission Mailed? Impossible Mission.

Where did Jenny go after the explosion? Everywhere

knock knock come in

What happened to the pleasure robot he pleasured someone in the pussy

Joey: hey bobby who you talking to? Bobby: oh yeah I forgot to tell you your mom died.

You know what's real bullshit? That stuff that comes out of a bull's ass.

What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A Jew is a person who practices the Jewish religion. A pizza is an italian dish consisting of dough, cheese, and tomato sauce.

The President, The Pope, and a small child are all in an airplane when the pilot announces that the plane is going to crash. They crash into the ocean and quickly remember that there is a life vest under their seats, which they promptly put on and safely inflate after exiting the cabin of the aircraft.

What happens to a blonde girl who is buying drugs off of a drug dealer? Nothing, she was an undercover police officer trying to arrest said drug dealers on the street.

What is it called when a black guy gets robed A crime

Why can't Hellen keller drive? Because she's a woman.

A man walk's into a bar with a monkey, I fotgot the rest of the joke. Your mom is a whore.

Why did little Sally fall off the swing? Because Sally has no arms. Knock knock! Who's there? Not Sally.

A black guy and a Mexican are sitting in a car who's driving??? The Cops

Why did the computer explode into a million peices? It was thrown off the Empire State building.

Why was the cat meowing really loud? It was on fire. Why did the cat suddenly stop meowing? It died.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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