Why am I telling you this joke? Because the person who did it before me mentioned that he enterted this, agreed to the Terms of Service and clicked submit - but missed out that he also typed in the capcha. Mine said: never quit.

A platypus walks into a bar. Why is there a butter knife in my basement?

Why can't women play poker? Because they're freaking stupid!

Which is funnier: a sack of coal or a sack of old clothes? Neither is particularly funny.

What do you call people who play dance dance revolution? Dancers

Did you hear about Phil in accounting? No? Well he was trying to make a new type of car. He took the seats from a ford engine from a dodge, and the frame from a toyota. Do you know what he got? 5 years in jail.

What did hitler say to the jacket potato? Your fucked now!

Awesome! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> minecraftnow.us <

What was wrong with the man watching a black and white television program? He wasn't watching a black and white television program at all-he actually had color blindness.

Why was the girl-scout crying? I hit her in the knee with a baseball bat.

A man walks into a bar. Oh, wait, no. It was a horse. So... A man walks into a horse

Roses are gray, Violets are gray, I'm colourblind.

Why couldn't the mother make her son's funeral? She died in a car crash on the way there.

yo moma so stupid she went to the dentist for a bluetooth.

Why did the jew save his money? Because his wife has cancer and the radiation treatments are very expensive.

What is big white and will kill you if it falls out of a tree in winter A refrigerator

If David has 40 chocolate bars and eats 35 what does David have now? Diabetes, David has diabetes.

TRICERATOPS!

Why were the parents sad? Because their son had a frog stapled to his face and was trying to eat his ice cream on a swing, but he had no arms so he dropped his ice cream into the street and he chased after his ice cream and got hit by a bus

What red, white, and blue? A white person who was raped by a clown.

So, what happens when Germany attacks France? France proceeds to slaughter the attackers mercilessly, as it was during the Feudal Ages, a time when France was Europe's superpower.

What did the penguin do in the desert? Die.

What did the cat say to the dog before chasing each other You have a nice looking ass

The only positive thing in my life, is the HIV test! Lymmel

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...