Robert Palmer: Doctor Doctor give me the news! Doctor: You have contracted lung cancer and AIDS. You will die before Christmas.

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What did the group of black men do to the old white woman? Gave her back the purse she dropped.

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You grand mothers so old she going to die soon.

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Joey: hey bobby who you talking to? Bobby: oh yeah I forgot to tell you your mom died.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm bad at poems... Nice t*ts

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Why did the boy kill his parents? Because he doesn't understand this joke either

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What did Robin do in between crime fighting? He had a paper route.

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How many Cancer patients does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One. Cancer does not affect one's ability to install light bulbs.

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If a large bear falls out of a tree, why would a giraffe also eat the cheese?

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What did the blonde order in the restaurant? A cup of coffee.

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Knock Knock Who's There Mailman Mailman who? Sir, I don't have time for this, take your mail.

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Sam slept and never woke up again.. Because he followed his dream.

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I dyed my armpit hair blue yesterday because I wanted to start a new trend. My boyfriend later broke up with me.

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If pro is the opposite of con what's the opposite of progress? Retrogression.

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What is brown and smells bad? A white person that had been bathed in brown paint, and didn't shower for the next month, and rubbed poop all over them, and rubbed diarrhea all over them and rubbed rock poop all over them and rubbed pee all over them, and rubbed mud all over them, and pooped in a bottle.

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Roses are red,violets are blue,hit me once I will break you to Roses are red,violets are blue,I will kick your ass, as hard as to

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I cant believe they been together after all that shit. (person ask what) and you say your buttchheeeeks:]

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What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

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How many Jews does it take to screw in a light bulb? 6 million, 1 to screw it in, and 5,999,999 to die in the holocaust.

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A black man, a gay man, and an Asian woman are sitting at a bar. The black man gets a phone call, and after the call all three of them are excited because they are all friends and the black man just got into a good college.

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My Friend Philip had his lip removed today. he is just Phil now.

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How do you get a clown off of a swing? You throw an axe at its face.

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A French man, Irish man and Japanese man walk into a bar, seeing as the men speak different languages no conversation begins.

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Mr Mac reminds me that no matter how hard you try you will always lose your hair

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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