If Irishmen didn't walk out of bars, they would collect and eventually fill the bars of the world and would die given the bars could not support them.

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who is the shortest man in the world? ADITYA DEV

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Knock. Knock. Who's there? Banana. Banana who? Are you mentally handicapped? Bananas are fruit.

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What's the worst part of being a black Jew? That is a very uncommon combination of race and religion, therefore causing obvious confusion.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, when the bass droped, my balls did too.

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Why did Johnny fall of the Swing?? Because i hit him with a shovel

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One man walks on a bridge, another man sees him but doesn't really care about him.

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Did you know Helen Keller had a playground in her backyard? Neither did she

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My house is on fire I'll probably die posting this joke

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How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could Chuck Norris? All of it.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a tomato.

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Knock Knock. Who's There? I don't know. I'm paralyzed.

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A plane crashes on the border of canada and america, where do you bury the survivors? I lied there are no survivors and the bodies were incinerated by burning jet fuel so theres nothing to bury.

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What's red and has two legs? Half a cat!

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What's the difference between The Hulk and The Thing? One is green.

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Why would Obama like to be ahead of some guy's poll and bent over at the same time? Because being ahead in someone's poll is encouraging news for his election campaign and bending over is part of the exercise program he uses to stay in shape.

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A black man wearing a belt. Oh, he has a shoelace!

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It was at the war and there was a camp site where a doctors helped injured soldiers. One soldier comes in the door and holds his arm. The doctor says "You got shot in the arm?" He says yes. Then another soldier walks in the door and holding his shoulder. The doctor says "You got shot in the shoulder?" He says yes. Then another soldier walks in the door and was dragging his left leg across the floor. The doctor says "You got shot in your leg?" The soldier says "No, I stepped on dog shhhttt."

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Why did Timmy mow the lawn? He didn't particularly like the way it looked Why did Timmy fall down the well? He is retarded and thirsty How did Timmy die? He had stage three lung cancer Why cant Timmy drive a car? He has been dead for three years

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Just the other day there was a house, and unforunatly Bob was a burn victim, the doctors said that he would have had a slow and excruciatingly painful death... Luckily he was already dead!

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What's the difference between a melon? One of its halves are both the same.

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Two men walk into a bar. The first man says to the bartender "I'd like some h2o". The second man says "I'd like some h2o to". The second man died.

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An anti-Semite, a Jew and an American walked into the bar. The barman said: "Hi, Sara".

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A man walks into a meat shop. Man: I bet you $20 you can't reach the meat on the top shelf. Butcher: The steaks are too high

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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