what is fun to eat but dumb when its alive? A dumb yummy candy

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What did one apple say to the other? Nothing, it is scientifically proven that apples can't talk.

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Jesus Christ

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Two fish are swimming and hit a concrete wall...dam

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Why did the ANTI-JOKE book cry? -It wasn't funny

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If a large bear falls out of a tree, why would a giraffe also eat the cheese?

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How do you stop a baby flying 100mph? a shovel

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Why did Susie fall off the swings? She had no arms. Knock! Knock! Who's there? Not Susie.

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Billy Idol walks into a New York City Bar. He snorts lines of coke with his comrades in the bathroom and continues his night by having sex with attractive underage females

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What did Steve Hagen say to Steve Walters? "We have the same first name."

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Why Was the student driver using his cell phone in the car? Because he had gotten in a mild accident with a midsized sedan so he was quickly dialing his AAA agent for roadside assistance so he can get back to his loving family and three children

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why did the kid sit alone at lunch? he had no friends

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Why was Joe lying on the ground? Because he got shot.

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Why did the man fall off of his bike? Because he is a Sikh who was mistaken for a muslim after the events of 9/11. His neighbors for 5 years have turned on him and now are throwing rocks at him to alleviate their anger while he is biking to his minimum wage job as a janitor at the local burger king, trying to make money for a family that doesn't love him anymore

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What do you get when you throw a piano down a mine shaft? A flat minor.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To buy more crystal meth to fuel his addiction while his wife and children starved in the public houses.

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why was the 6 afraid of the 7? because 7 was a registered 6 offender.

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Why do birds fly South in the winter? Warmer, better food sources and therefore greater chance of survival.

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What do you call an Arabic man who crashed a plane into a business building? A careless pilot whose recklessness caused him to crash into a building. His stupidity and lack of plane control skill led to a horrible accident that involved the death of thousands of innocent people and the death of many business people's office pets.

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Water is blue. Fire is red. Come on let me show you what happen in the bed.

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Ask me Whats 2+2. ? Ok what's 2 plus 2 4 you dumb ass

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A hooded black man walks into a Convenience store. He orders a cup of hot chocolate as it is very cold outside.

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A man walks into a bar with a frown on his face His dog just died

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whats long hard and full of seamen? a submarine.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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