What did the bullet say to Bin-Laden? Suck it

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What is long, hard, and full of semen? An erected penis.

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How many people does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One to drop it and die of gas poisoning.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, most chickens are held on farms, but those that do roam free are afraid of automobiles so therefore they wouldn't go near a road at all. But if the chicken was located in a deserted town there would be no traffic, so then it would be able to cross freely over any road there and not get injured or mortally wounded.

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There was a boy and..........his dad said to go to the store to get his daily thing.........he went to the store and bought it......he came home and said.....HERE ARE THE EGGS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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Q: You know what never gets old? A: The kids in a school shooting

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Whats do Hispanics and Blacks have in common? They are both stereo-typically defined and thus the subject of many popular jokes.

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A Christian, a Sunni Muslim, and a Shi'a Muslim walked into a government building. Turns out, they were Lebanese, so this was a normal occurrence. Thus, to draw any humor from it before first taking into account the weaknesses of your own government would be both unwise and unfair.

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you go to cvs and theres a robber trying to shoot everyone and the cashier says do you have a rewards card

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Two muffins were sitting in an oven. One says "Holy cow it's hot in here!" The other one says "Wow, I'm a muffin and I can TALK!"

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A skeleton walks into a bar and orders a whiskey sour and a mop.

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What stinks of shit and has money. Smelly Mc Dee I lied about the money.

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whats worse than sitting next to jack grindey nothing

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A guy reads the bible Another guy shouts "spoiler alert, the main character dies"

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Well Here Goes Nothing And nothing happened

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Hey there, I like bananas! No you don't.

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What do you call a Jew with 20 Pounds of Pennies? A rich man

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why did the chicken cross the road? he was stapeled to a cow and the cow got hit by a bus so they died.

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what do you call an anoying ginger? jimmy overby

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Why didn't Avery die when he got hit by a bus? The bus was going three miles per hour.

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-How much wood would a woodchuck chuck, if a woodchuck could chuck wood? -Probably a decent amount.

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I haven't been this tired since the last time I was tired

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Why did the boy fall off the swing? -Because he didn't have any arms!

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A black man walks into a store with a ski mask on... what does he do?? he buys skiis.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops