how many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? It depends on a variety of factors such as the size of your mouth, the amount of saliva, etc.

What did the traffic light say to the car? Bye.

What's worse than seeing another antijoke with "The Holocaust" punchline repeated? The Holocaust.

a dyslecstic son seys to his mum can i have a mcdonald for tea the mum seys ye if you can spell mcdonlds and the son seys fuk that im having a kcf

How do you confuse a bar tender? You ask him how tender he is.

What more fun than a barrel full of monkeys? A barrel of dead babies

Did I say twenty times? I meant two hundred, you already know this I gather, but your subconcious understands mathmatics and multiplications at a whole different level because its potential is indefinite.

What was the only thing the little boy from tanzania had? AIDS.

Why did god create planet earth? He isn't real.

How did the man escape the giant scorpion? He didn't he watched as his family died and waited for his demise crying in the corner of the scorpion's layer

What can you tell by a black guy who walks into a bank with a ski mask on? His face was severely disfigured in a horrific accident.

Okay, hundred billions, and because I am fucking hungry, we make it perpetual, now the longer you keep the feeling going, the stronger and stronger and you know, trillions, indefillions, nondecillions, hell, make up your own numbers and just consider them higher. Bet its starting to feel pretty nice huh?

Why did the man cross the road? He was in a state of depression and chose to commit suicide.

Why did Hitler Commit suicide? Because he was completely depressed and overwhelmed by the fact he had lost World War II.

Heads or tails? Heads. Sorry, I'm fresh out.

Did you hear about the three black guys who got run over by a car? No? Neither did Ray Charles!

Knock Knock? Why did you just say knock knock just ring the doorbell

Joe has 30 candy bars and eats 25. What does john have now? DIABETIES. Joe has diabeties. Please comment!!!!!!!

why did the magician stop doing magic ? he got hit by a bus and died

Cyrus: Can you dig it?! Phil: I can feel it calling in the air tonite……..oh lord

if a tree falls in A Forest, would Robert Smith hear?

A horse walked into a bar. The bartender said "why the long face?" The horse then panicked, and feeling threatened, it kicked the bartender with its hind legs and galloped out of the bar. A civilian took immediate control of the situation and dialed the number for animal control, who arrived shortly and tranquilized the deer and put it back in its natural habitat. Don't worry, that didn't actually happen

What do you call a Muslim man flying a plane? The pilot.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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