Q: Why is little Timmy living without his parents? A: He is ninety seven years old!

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don't repeat this joke!don't repeat this joke!don't repeat this joke!don't repeat this joke!don't repeat this joke!

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This is a joke about Helen Keller. "Knock knock" "Who's there?

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Q-Why did the man fall out of the behemoth A- he had no legs

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A redhead and a blonde both go out to smoke a cigarette. They are both at risk of lung cancer.

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how do you piss off a dyslexic? give him a crossword puzzle

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How do you make a baby stop crawling? Nail it to the ground

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Why can't the black guy read? Because he's blind.

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why did the blonde fall down a mineshaft? Beacuse the rapist needed somewhere to hide the body

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What did the Farmer say when he lost his tractor? "Where's my tractor?"

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When Chuck Norris moved into a new house he decide to renovate because he didn't like the staircase.

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Fathers Day at Tyrone's house.

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Knock knock. ... ... *after waiting 30 seconds or so to no answer, the knocker concludes there is no one home and decides to go home to take his son to soccer practice and work on his taxes, and maybe call his mother to see how her foot surgery went* Who's there? Oh.. This is awkward, I forgot why I was here in the first place. I have to go. Bye.

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Why did the Asian boy drop his milk? Because he had a stroke.

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A Hispanic, a Caucasian, and an African American walk into a bar. The bartender says, "What is this, some kind of a joke?"

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Alchohol.

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Q: Why didn't the bunny eat the carrot? A: The bunny didn't have any carrots. Poor bunny.

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a blond, a brunette, and a redhead are stuck on top of a mountain. they freeze to death and the rescue team discovers their frozen bodies two days later.

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Why do women wear makeup and perfume? Because they are ugly and they smell bad.

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What's as hard as rock and as light as a feather? Any object in the space, once the lack of gravity makes atoms to have not weight, since mass x gravity equals to weight.

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why did the boy drop the ball. he was shot in the head.

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God, you know after creating humanity and kinda regretting it and stuff, fell into drinking and betting. He found Sin a fellow poker player, and all was good. Until God, drinking a bit too much bet a bit too many of his creds: Son. Jesus: Yes father. God: Uh, I kinda ended up low on cash on the poker game last night and I kinda well... I am gonna be frank here, I bet you and lost. NeroMetal Not dissing the bible, just enjoying the always brighter side of life eh? ;)

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What has two legs and bleeds between them? The back half of a dog with a deep cut in its belly.

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what did one apple say to another apple nothing apples cant talk

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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