Why did the chicken cross the road? Lebron traveled

Whats the difference between right and left? I stabbed your mom with my left hand.

Who's gay? Justin Beaver

what did the hammer do on the test -he nailed it.

“When life gives you lemons, don’t make lemonade. Make life take the lemons back! Get mad! I don’t want your damn lemons, what the hell am I supposed to do with these? Demand to see life’s manager! Make life rue the day it thought it could give Cave Johnson lemons! Do you know who I am? I’m the man who’s gonna burn your house down! With the lemons! I’m gonna get my engineers to invent a combustible lemon that burns your house down!”

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to your house. Knock knock. Who's there? The chicken.

Why did the pregnant Mexican cross the border? Nobody knows. She was shot down on site.

What did the cat say to the other cat? Meow

What's the difference between jumping off of a 2 story building and a 20 story building? You're more likely to die from the latter.

How do you starve a Mexican? You stick him in a secure room and deprive him of food resources

Why did the chicken cross the road?

What's the difference between a blonde and a carrot? One's a human, the other's a vegetable.

What are the similarites between Autistic people and dead people? They are both very poor in social situations

Two muffins were in an oven. The first muffin says: 'It sure is hot in here!' The second muffin says: 'Why are they only cooking two muffins?'

ROSE ARE BROWN VIOLETS ARE BROWN WHO SH*IT IN MY GARDEN!!!!!

How do you knock up a Catholic girl? Put your penis into her vagina without wearing a condom.

Tell me who you are, who you are working for, I wont tell anybody, and I will have someone to hack this site on the hour and remove these comments, please.

Why did the man die after getting his picture taken The camera was a gun

Why was the wife laying on the ground crying? Because she wasn't in the kitchen making a sandwich for her husband

i'm not random but cheese does get a bit purple if you leave it in your laptop then the battery dies and the sun expands and kills every dodo alive even though they're extinct but that not the point

How many dyslexic people does it take to ruin Christmas? One, because they murdered you mother on your birthday.

A young blind boy is being tucked into bed by his mother. The mom says "Now Billy, pray really hard tonight and tomorrow, your wish will come true!". Billy says, "Ok mommy." and goes to sleep. The next morning, Billy wakes up and screams "MOMMY! I'm still blind, my wish didn't come true!", the mom answered, "I know - April Fools!"

For 10 cents a day you can feed an African...they eat pennies.

What's oily and smells like smegma? Kevin Crummy

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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