why barack obama sad he realized the 4 trillion dollars of debt wasn't going be solved by borrowing more money

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What did George Washington say to his men before crossing the Delaware River? "Men, we're crossing the Delaware River."

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Why did the black man get laid off? His company was no longer doing well and he was not needed.

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What did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? We're both lawyers.

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"Good Morning, I'm Dr. Pepper" "Like the drink?" "Huh... yes... just like the drink" Would you mind to sit right here Mr..... "Nike" "Oh, just like the shoes" "How do you dare!"

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What did the doctors tell the boy with cancer who is on his way to being released from the hospital? "you are going to die," why give him hope and be proved wrong. This way if they are wrong the whole situation is a miracle, if they are right..... "I told you so"

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Why can't the T-Rex give high fives? Because they are extinct.

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why couldn't the girl watch t.v? Because her house burned down

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What do you call a black guy doing community service? Someone who wanted to give back. Stop being racist.

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What do you call a guy walking into a bar Dave, because that's his name

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Who created Apple? Steve jobs.

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What's purple and has four legs? I don't know. What? I DONT KNOW EITHER THAT'S WHY I'M ASKING YOU IN THE FIRST PLACE!

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Officer i'm dot nrunk, beriously you gotta selieve me!

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knock knock come in

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A deaf man walks into a bar. Someone yells, "FIRE!" and everyone evacuates. The deaf man does not hear him and dies horribly.

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why was the little boy crying? he was at his mother's funeral.

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Person 1. Knock-knock. Person 2. Who's there? Person 1. The doctor. Person 2. The doct-- Person 1. You have cancer and have about three weeks to live.

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I man walks into a bar. He orders a drink, takes around 13.5 minutes to drink it, then walks out. It takes him 10.7 minutes to walk home, 2.8 minutes less than he spent in the bar. When he is home, he decides to have a bath. 7.8 minutes into bathing, a radio plugged into an outlet near his tub falls into the water with him and he is killed. 29 miles away a woman sneezes twice.

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What do Barney and a butchers knife have in common? One of them is purple

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How do you get a Mexican's attention? "Excuse me, may I have your attention?"

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why did Kanye interrupt Taylor Swift at the VMA's? because he had a little too much scotch before the ceremony

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What do you call a middle-eastern man flying a plane? A pilot

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Knock knock Who's there? Eiiiiijajajaajaja EIIIIJAAAA

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What day is it today? It's "Jack Daniels Day" according to that guy with the shopping cart filled with kittens.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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