where's mom I killed her

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how do u stop a cat from peeing on the floor? Kill it... haha

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What is white, average height and cannot jump as high as a black man? A fridge.

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If there's something strange in you neighbourhood, who you gonna call? my mate Jonno who has a gun.

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what do you call a man with no arms or legs? numerous abusive terms as you kickk him to death.

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Jack: Hey, you know what sucks? Jill: Vacuums Jack: Hey, you know what sucks in a metaphorical sense? Jill: Black holes Jack: Hey, you know what just isn't cool? Jill: Lava?

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It's better if you don't understand

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God saw himself. Finally, proof.

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Q:Whats the difference between Glenn Close and a black widow? A:one is a person, the other is a species of spider.

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Knock Knock Whos there? You You Who? Who You Oh im Jim.

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Obama One Big Ass Mistake America

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Roses are Red Violets or Red Trees are Red HOLY SH*T MY GARDEN'S ON FIRE!

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A Hispanic, a Caucasian, and an African American walk into a bar. The bartender says, "What is this, some kind of a joke?"

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Yo momma's so hairy when you were born you almost died from rug burn.

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Why isn't Juley at school today? Oh Her father chopped off her arms and legs, gagged her, ripped out both eyes and threw her in a lake tied to cinderblocks!

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Hickory dickory dock, The mouse ran up the clock, Barbara called the exterminator, Who killed all 10 of them.

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A man walks into a bar. He I then taken to the hospital for a major head injury.

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Three construction workers, an Italian guy, a Mexican guy, and a American guy are sitting on top of a building eating lunch. The Italian is tired of eating meatballs, the Mexican is eating a burrito, and the American is eating a cheeseburger. They are all fed up with eating the same lunch every day. The next day they all jump off the building for unrelated reasons. It is a tragedy and their families mourn the loss.

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when geese fly in a v formation, why is one side always longer then the other? Because you touch yourself at night...

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What happened to the homeless man at midnight? He took a shit on the ground

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Q: Whats worst than the Holocaust A: If a second Holocaust happened, and then you found an apple in your apple

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What does the ship say when it's cold? Shiver me timbers

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A black man and a Mexican are in the back of a car, who's driving? Their father Micheal, he adopted both of them from a mentally handicapped orphanage when they were five.

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Roses are gay Violets are gayer when you hear girls moaning im the player

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops