Why did the family sue disney? Because at a meet and greet location mickey mouse shot their youngest in the heart.

what do you call a black man in the bank holding a bag of money. One wealthy man

Beans, beans, the magical fruit. The more you eat, the more you have consumed.

What's worse than a bee sting? A large number of things ranging from getting stung by two bees to falling off a cliff.

What was funny about the Halocast? Nothing, thousands of innocent people died

Think of a number, add it by 7, subtract it by 2, and multiply it by 4. Now close your eyes, isn't it dark?

What's worse than a wet sock? Being molested as a child.

why did the hobo want cancer so badly? he really needed a haircut

What's the difference between a lamp?

Why couldn't the color blind orphan find his apple? Because he was also blind.

What's the difference between a picnic table and a Mexican? A picnic table can support a family of four.

I just had major Deja Vu... Cool, Brett. No one cares.

What is square, brown, and smells funny? A box with a dead body in it.

What did the black fire-fighter do when the house caught fire? The heroic man ran inside and got every animal and person inside to the out side and then proceeded to extinguish the flames with his fire-extinguisher out, thus saving most of the families valuables. He was then awarded a raise in his salary for his heroic valor. Although any fire-fighter could have done this because of the hard work and dedication that is put into training. So really describing the race that this heroic man is was totally pointless.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, it got hit by a truck.

Why did Jim not go to the park and play football with his Dad today? His dad got hit by a bus and lost his legs

How do u know what a ass is. You no once you meet adam mac.

Do you know what my Granddad said to me before he kicked the bucket? He said; how far do you think I could kick this bucket? Then he died.

Jon waits in his driveway for a bit then rides off to a lemonade stand but doesn't stop because the stand is surrounded by police who have arrested the kids at the stand for selling spiked lemonade. He continues past the stand and goes somewhere else (probably Subway).

what do you do when you see a black man limping across your frontyard? you stop laughing an reload.

Ok so im on antijoke.com and they tell me i can write my own joke... so i did.

Why did Tim fall out of the window? Well... he didn't exactly fall... I pushed him

why did suzie fall off the swing? she had no arms why did suzie get hit by a bus? she was blind knock knock whos there? not suzie.

An armadillo walks into a bar, and shouts "I hear you don't serve armadillos." "That is correct," the bartender replies.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...