Q. What did the Vampire say when he ate the Pizza? A. Nothing. It is literally impossible for a vampire to be real, therefore it's insane if you thought it said something.

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A 10 year old underpriveledged boy goes to the second mile camp and meets his new counselor: Penn State defensive coordinator Jerry Sandusky. The two bond very much and talk a lot. Sandusky invites the boy back to the locker room to shower because the boy got muddy. The boy takes a shower, gets clean, and goes back to his cabin. The boy has a great time at the camp and goes home.

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3 guys are in a car crap manners and shut up.shut up is driving and crape falls out the window so manners goes and gets him. A cop pulls over shut up.he goes what's your name son?shut up.where's your manners boy?over there picking up crape.

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What did the doctor say to his wife? We have grown apart over the years, I want a divorce.

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What do you call it when you take cheese that isn't yours? Stolen bitch, your under-arrest!

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I am not physically scarred, rather mentally, lets just say my childhood was a lot less than pleasant, I got no idea where you got that "Nero lost an arm" thing, I got both arms working. But I guess I often feel alone because only I can feel, see and experience the pain of the scars a terrible childhood has left me with. You are right though, it is easy to give up saying that humanity is not ready or worthy, making me feel as Dr.Doom or something alike, hidden behind some suit of armor still ashamed for things I know that I am not, but that still burn deep within my mind. PTSD buddy, it does not matter if I logically believe that I am competent or not, when my past is engraved, etched into my soul, constantly telling me I am not, so helping others is actually pretty easy, yet saving myself, I do not know how anymore, it is easy to change the minds of those that have not been broken time after time physically and mentally by those which they love the most. I will heal, your words are inspiring, thank you.

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Hitler walks in to pizza pizza, the manager asks how many? L

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What did the mexican say when two houses fell on him? Nothing. He was dead.

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Watch me whip, watch me nae nae

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What do you call a black man driving a fire truck? A firefighter you racist.

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What did the blind man say to the mentally challenged man when he bumped into him? Watch where you're going, retard.

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How did the Jew escape the concentration camp?

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a tomato

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What is an offensive way to refer to black people from the time of the Flint Stones? Niggers

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Knock Knock Who's There Carly Carly Who Hey I just met you, and this is crazy So here's my number and call me maybe

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A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead become stranded on a desert island. As they are searching for food and shelter, they come across a mystical-looking lamp. They rub the lamp, but nothing happens because genies don't exist.

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Q: What do you call a black man with no arms and no legs? A: Whatever his first name is.

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What's worse than dropping your loli-pop? The Holocaust

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What's the difference between a Jew and an apple? One of them is a fruit, and the other is not.

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Why does Tim Teblow love men? Logan Cole told him to.

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What is yellow, has wheels, and lies on its back? A school bus in a terrible accident.

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What happened to the little girl who fell into the lake? She was rescued and made a complete recovery.

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why did the kid fall off his bike he had a serious illness which made it difficult for him to play sports

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What did the white man say to the black man? Did you see the game yesterday?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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