What's the dumbest animal in the rainforest? A polar bear.

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Why did the black man take the watermelon? Because he bought it, and watermelons are delicious.

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What happened to the Chicken who crossed the road? It made it to the other side!

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What's black and has ne education? A tire.

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How many pupils does the teacher have? 2.

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Patient: Doctor, do I have cancer? Doctor: Yes. Patient: Will I live? Doctor: No. Patient: So what do I do? Doctor: SUCK IT UP!!!

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Wanna hear a joke? Me neither.

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Lol, she does not think anything, she knows. Its not unfaithfulness if you ask for permission and are granted so because the trust is strong and mutual.

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whats the difference between a ladybug and a jew? there is none

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How can you tell if your blind date is going to be good looking? Go on the date and see if they're good looking.

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What do you get when you cross a Lion and a Shark? You would likely get trouble, seeing as its both animals are quite dangerous and crossing even one of them is ill advised.

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Q: What's worse than burning your tongue on hot chocolate. A: Getting shanked by a homeless man

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A man goes and buys a head of cabbage. The cabbage had a worm in it. When the man saw the worm, he threw out the cabbage and bought a new one the next time he went to the grocery store.

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*there was a tv sitting on the side of the road..* person 1: hey why doesn't that tv work? person 2: because it's broken?? person 1: no..because its not plugged in!

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An elephant walks into a bar. Several people are trampled.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Chet. Chet who? I probably shouldn't be giving you my name, just get in the fucking van...

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When life gives you lemons squeeze them at people then run away.

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roses are red, violets are blue, im a bad poet, text me. LMFAO

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Why can't the blonde dial 911? The battery on her phone is dead and she needs to recharge it. (Good thing there's no emergency.)

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Roses are grey Violets are grey I'm a dog

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What do a Siamese cat and a birch tree have in common? Both exist.

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Q: what do you call a hooker you pay in spaghetti? A: a pasta-tute.

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How do you get a camel out of a desert? a helicopter

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How do you kill a blonde? You stab her many times in the ear with a fork......Then finsih her off with a spoon. No knives those hurts

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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