Why didn't Sally go to the party? Because everybody hates her and she wasn't invited.

What do you call a duck playing a trombone? Hallucinations

A man is standing on the street corner waiting for the bus. As it pulls up he steps on and pays his fare while he whistles to his iPod.

You: Did u hear the one about that guy walking into a bar? Them: No. You: He said it hurt

Have you heats about the Guy who's parents died in à car crash... No He killen himself because of hus parents Deathstars

What did the foreigners do to pass time? They blew up the twin towers.

A smiling Frog talks with a lion O O U What do u eat for breakfast lion? V V T T Smiling frogs __(___ |____| O O -

Knock Knock whos there? a black man ohh ok come in

Why didn't Michael J. Fox feel the Virginia earthquake? He was on vacation in Maui.

there are two wales chilling at a bar one looks at the other and does a wale call for 2 minutes and the other looks back and say "dude your drunk we gotta go!"

What's worst then getting struck by lightening? your face.whats worse then seeing your face? NOTHING

what did the judge say to the lawyer during a trial. He said We are all in a court. thus concluding that the judge was retarted.

Q. Why did Sarah fall off of the swing? A. She had no arms. Knock, knock. Who's there? Not Sarah!

What do you call a police officer who kills a black person? Innocent

like if your cool

Q:why is walmart so big? A:Years ago a man named Sam Walton had a vision for one stop shopping. And it goes without saying that being a one stop shop must mean you have a lot of inventory thus the size of Walmart is a lot larger to hold and support the increased mass of inventory .

João Duarte reads this.

i am a slasher, a slasher of prices to get to the other side. poop goo goo gaga

A black man, a jew, a hispanic, and an asian are the only survivors of a plane crash, and end up on a deserted island, what do they do? Die.

Why did the teacher's cat die? It had cat herpes and feline immunodeficiency virus

What's the difference between Paris Hilton and a cow? Cows are ruminants, meaning that they have a digestive system that allows use of otherwise indigestible foods by regurgitating and rechewing them as "cud". Paris Hilton, on the other hand, is a human being. Therefore, her stomach digests the bolus (masticated food) only after it has exited the oesophagus into the body of the organ, where it is digested into chyme and then passed through the pyloric sphincter into the duodenum.

A man got struck by a car and was rushed to hospital on life support, he died shortly after. His wife was informed of his death by the doctors and shortly after she killed her children and finally hung herself.

the moment right after you finish the last harry potter and remember the world wasn't saved and you still have cancer

So a clown walks up to you and asks, "What'll always STICK with you? The violent disposition of humanity."

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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