- Anti Joke

A pirate walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Hey, did you know you have a steering wheel down your pants?" The pirate replies, "Arrrgh, there's been a horrible nautical accident. Please call an ambulance immediately."

What did the passive-aggressive woman do to her husband? She killed him. As it turns out, the slight passive-aggressive behavior she was showing was actually an early warning sign of a dangerous sociopathic mental disorder. The authorities are looking for her as we speak and will soon have her institutionalized.

Once upon of time, there was an ugly duckling. It was so ugly that everyone died. The end.

what's the difference between a zebra and a horse They are spelled differently

What do you call a white guy in a mostly black neighborhood? His name.

Dylan Hodge's mother touches her own butthole at night. Joshua Brown's sister rubs Josh's earlobes passionately. Brock is a fag. Jacob is Awesome. Daniel THINKS he's awesome. Jamie kills everyone. Apart from Jacob.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the chicken was trying to escape from the sad and depressing environment that surrounded him on the side he thus came from. Alas, he did not know that he would be soon hit by a drunk truck driver, who would also die, in a bright explosion of morbid flames and screams.

A man walks into his cubicle and sits down. After a long day of work, he goes home and happens to die whilst eating dinner.

An Englishman, and Irishman and a Scotsman are on a plane. The plan is carrying too much weight, and is destined to crash. They drop the luggage, but there is still too much weight on board. They drop the secondary engine, but there is still too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

Q: What do you call a man with no arms and no legs going down a mountain? A: As good as dead.

This guy gets on a plane and leaves he takes a bite of a green Apple and says to sower then he takes a bite out of a red Apple and says to sweet so he takes a bite of a gernade and says to crunchy so the plane lands and he walks past a little boy crying and says little boy why are you crying because a green Apple came down and hit my dog in the head so he's walking along and sees a nether boy crying and says little boy why are you crying cause a red Apple came down and hit me on the head so he's walking along abd sees a little girl laughing little girl he says why are you laughing cause I farted and the building be hind me bluw up lol ????

How do you make a toddler run faster? Chase it with a lawnmower.

What did the Mexican firefighter name his twin sons? Nothing, his wife had an abortion.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops

a charmander decided to take a swim a.w. j.p.

Q) What's worse than getting a parking ticket? A) The Black Death

Have you seen Ray Charles' new house? Neither has he...

If life hands you lemons your probably hallucinating.

Your mums so tall, she's above the average height of women for her age.

Yo mommas so stupid, she has a slightly below average IQ.

what did the policeman say to an armed robber? you can go, as long as you don't hurt my doughnuts

What is the difference between a pizza and a Jew?

why did the boy fall to the ground? He was struck by lightning

What's brown and sticky? A black man covered in syrup.

Two guys are walking on a bridge. One has long hair. The other does not care.