How do you make a clown sad? You kill his family.

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I once was told that life is like a box of chocolates, but then realized that it wasn't

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What do you call a Mexican kicking a ball? A soccer player

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What do you call a black man flying a plane. A pilot.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To escape his burning car wreck.

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple Finding 2 worms in your apple

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what's black and white and red all over? a zebra in a blender

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How many rats does it take to screw in a light bulb? Two. But they have to be really small.

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Why did the woman come out of the kitchen? She didn't.

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My mom told me and my brother to lean up on a commercial...we were watching netflix

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Why did the Egyptian woman not manage to work the washing machine? The instructions were in English.

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Why did the boy fall off his bike? His mother threw a brick at him.

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Michael Jackson and Barack Obama talked to each other about oreos

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Q: What did the crippled deaf kid get for Christmas? A: A motorised wheelchair and a cochlear implant. Good for him.

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Why did the bus drive off the cliff? It's driver happened to be a tomato.

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Why aren't there Olympics in Mexico? Idk Because everyone that can run jump or swim are already across the boarder.

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What is green, has four legs, and if it falls out of a tree and onto your head, it will kill you? A pool table.

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Q: Why was the chicken waterboarded? A: Because the guy liked being cruel to animals.

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A blonde drank an entire fruit smoothie in one sitting. She got a brain freeze.

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Three drunk llamas wearing sombreros are walking down the street. They walk in silence, lost in their own thoughts.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Faces like yours belong in the zoo But dont worrie ill be there Not in a cage But laughing at you

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Hey, is that your corvette? No, I thought it was yours.

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How do you confuse your algebra teacher? Tell her to prove that she exists.

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To the 'am i pregnant now?'-section: Yesterday I spilled mustard on my brand new pants. That was just before I went out to some clubs. That night, after I had enjoyed myself with friends and alcohol, while I was walking home I was raped several times by big, black and hung men. It hurt a lot and my anus is still bleeding. My question is: What is the best way to get rid of the mustard stain?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops