Why did the blond get fired from her job at the M&M factory? Because she threw out all the M&M's with W's on them.

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A drunk guy walks into a car

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Q: Why did the mugger kill the bus driver? A: Because he had a gun.

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What do you think when you see an asian woman behind the wheel of a car? She's very attractive.

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What's brown and sticky? A lump of shit.

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Q:Why couldn't the man lick his ice cream? A: Because he lost all of his tongue due to the chemicals of cigarettes.

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Why did little Suzan fall of the swing? She has no arms. Knock,Knock Who's there? Not Suzan

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Why wouldn't Leena sleep with Ole? Because she thought him to be a dumb, ugly, Scandinavian.

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Knock Knock Who's There Mailman Mailman who? Sir, I don't have time for this, take your mail.

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what starts with b and ends with b? The bomb i just planted in your house.

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Why couldn't the T-Rex clap his hands? Because he's dead.

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Q-Why the baby drop is lollypop? A: He got hit by a truck

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What did one dog say the the other dog? "We are both dogs"

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Yo mommas so stupid, she has a slightly below average IQ.

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What do you call a tall midget? Well tall is a relative term so a midget may be considered tall compared to something or someone shorter. Say if a midget was compared to a baby he/she would be considered tall, considering the baby's small height. However midgets are looked at short by most people who are taller than them because of their physical problem that they can do nothing about.

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Q: How does 5 gay people walk together? A: In One Direction.

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How many candles did Johnny blow out on his birthday cake? The same number of candles which corresponds to his age.

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Why was the door opened? Because I opened it

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Two Jews are sitting in a large oven. They realize it is a dangerous place to be and get out of the oven.

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A guy walks into a bar and orders a glass of water. A few seconds later he drinks the water.

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"Knock Knock" "Who's there?" "Knock Knock Knock" "Knock knock Knock who?" "Just let me in, you twat, it's freezing out here!"

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Roses are red violets are blue monkeys like you belong in the zoo but don't be afraid I'll be there to that in the cage but laughing at you

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whats the difference between kroush and a bucket of shit? the bucket

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Why did the ceiling fall down? Because there weren't any walls.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops