What do you call a penguin sliding down a hill how should i know.

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You know what's funny? You can't spell manslaughter without laughter.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? You reading another one of these again?

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Repeat after me... I'matote ulbu twad Now say that all together Im a total butt wad

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Two fish are swimming and hit a concrete wall...dam

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A man walks into a bar. He is then taken to the hospital for his concussion, seeing as the bar was made of metal

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A guy walks into a doctor's office and says: "Doctor! Doctor! You gotta help me! One day I'm a teepee, and the next day I'm a wigwam, and then the next day I'm a teepee, and then the next day I'm a wigwam again. The doctor says: Sir, we've been over this 100 times! You have stage 4 pancreatic cancer...

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Why did the duck cross the road? Because he was tired of the publicity his friend, the chicken was getting for crossing the road that he wanted to do it himself. Halfway across the duck was wistfully hit by a car and sadly, his story is lesser known and 99% of the people in this world really don't care about him. Thumbs up if you're that 1% that shows sympathy toward the duck.

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I don't understand what's so bad about a worm in your apple. Just get the proper software to clean it up, or even better, get a PC

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Q: What do you call a black man with no arms and no legs? A: Whatever his first name is.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? grape. Grape who? Purple grape.

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Why Americans are so bad at League of Legends? Because they can't defend their towers.

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How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

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Q: Why was the little girl cowering in a closet in a corner. A: Because there was a murderer/rapist in her house with her oarents gone.

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Why did Wiggy fall into the toilet? Wiggy was the name of his turd.

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Three Blondes were walking when they come upon some tracks. The first blonde says they're deer tracks. The second blonde says they're elk tracks. The last blonde says they're moose tracks. While they are all arguing about what type of tracks they are, they get hit by a train.

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What did the Insomniac, Dyslexic Priest do? He stayed up all night wondering if there really is a Dog.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know ask a second grader.

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What do you call a black man driving a plane? A pilot, you racist.

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Q: Why can't you give Elsa a balloon? A: Because she is a fictional character.

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I'm a burrito... With a big shirt.

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your mama so old, shes dead.

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What's the difference between apples and oranges? You can't wash a window with a spade.

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So this guy was making a sandwich...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops