Why are black people afraid of chainsaws? Because chainsaws are powerful machines, capable of dismemberment and death when wielded by someone who wishes to cause harm

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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A man came home and witnessed his wife having an affair with another man. The husband and wife got into a huge argument and eventually got divorced

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What do you get if you put a baby in a blender? An Erection

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Friend: how obsessed are you with harry potter on a scale from 1-10 Me: 9 and 3/4

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Why does austin bell like it up the butt? Cause he's a cat a kitty cat meow meow meow and meow meow meow

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No your aunties a joke

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If i was given a penny every time i hear "It's not my fault". I will have the money equal to the nominal price multiplied by the count of times i heard that phrase.

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What's more disturbing than finding an apple in your worm? The fact that you're eating a worm.

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What does an Eagle and a Mole have in common? The are both of the kingdom Animalia, possessing many organ systems and cellular similarities. And they both live underground. Except for the Eagle.

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Who's gay? Justin Beaver

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What do you call a black guy that flies a plane? a pilot.

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What is green and if it fell on you from a tree it would kill you? A pool table.

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Once upon a time there was a young teenager who was bullied a lot. She died 100 years ago.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I am a florist.

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Q How is it Going Patty? A:Hi Patrick hows it going?

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What did the cat say to the dog? Miaow. What did the dog say to the cat? Miaow.

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How do you wake up Lady Gaga? You set the alarm for a reasonable time. - Louis

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A horse walks into a bar, the bartender asks him "why the long face?" "All horses have long faces" he replied.

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What do you call a deer that has no eyes? I have no eyedeer

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What do you call a black midget in space? The first true example of how hard work, dedication and sacrifice can help you to achieve your goals.

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Why do aliens listen to relaxing music while they have sex? They like to cum in peace. \m/

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What do you call a hairy pussy? A cat.

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Q: When did the man realize it was 5:00am? A: When it became 5:00am.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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