Q: How are a plum and a rabbit alike? A: They're both purple, except for the rabbit.

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What's worse than missing your flight? 9/11

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What's green and if you eat it you die? A Biljarts table.

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why did the f a g perform fellatio? because he was a sick c unt

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What do you call 10 old black people in a barn? Used farm equipment

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What's worse than seeing a real joke on this website? Having diarrhea.

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Before her maiden voyage, they told the Titanic she could become anything. So she became a submarine.

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Why dont blind people go skydiving? Because they dont live when they hit the ground

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Man goes to the doctors, says doctor, im depressed. ive tried everything but i just cant see the bright side of life anymore, it seems empty to me, like theres no point in existing. The doctor certifies the man as clinically depressed and alerts the relevant authorities.

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Why does Gandalf have special powers? Because Dumbledore died.

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Haikus are easy, But sometimes they don't make sense. Refrigerator.

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What did the apple say to the orange? Nothing because apples can't talk.

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What falls down but never gets hurt? A professional stuntman wearing protective gear.

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Q:What do you call an insecure person A:Somebody who is likely to commit suicide

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a jewish man walks into a wall with an erection. what hits first? his erection

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Q: why did the white man buy a burge A: cuz he was hungry

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Yo mamma's so fat she attracts other matter with a force proportional to the product of their masses divided by the square of the distance.

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A horse walks into a bar. Bartender says, "What'll it be?" The horse never replied.

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How many chickens does it take to cross the road? It only takes 1 chicken to cross the road. You don't need a lot.

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I AM FAGNETO! MASTER OF FAGNET! WELCOME TO FÅG! DIE X-FÅGGOT! XD Okay Fagneto`s roll me out of here, I am done with the super important last message to uh... You? No wait that sounds wrong, stop laughing you korean piece of... Seriously sorry I am drugged, you guys put enough valium in me to kill a cow, so please roll me out... I used to have a lot of korean friend you know, but then I killed them for being korea... seriously my fingers magically type shit when I am done, please roll me out of here, and fill that... Kundalini express? Is it me or did this get even more fagneto... Get me out of here now now now no

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what do you call a girl with a pumpkin spice coffee in her hands? Jenifer

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What do you call a doctor without a head? Deceased

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have Alzheimer's And add extra pepperoni

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Roses are red violets are blue vodka cost less than dinner for two

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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