How did Helen Keller's parents discipline her? Hopefully not too sternly. There's not much trouble a blind and deaf girl can get into, one would imagine.

"Why did Suzie fall off the swing?" "She had no arms." "What did Suzie get for Christmas?" "Cancer." "What's the difference between a Lamborghini and a tub of dead babies?" "I don't have a Lamborghini in my garage." "What did Suzie get for Christmas from me?" "My tub of dead babies."

Tommy was excited to get a tattoo of a falafel on his wiener. He got skin cancer.

What was going through the man's head on the 51st floor when the first plane hit? The 52nd floor.

Why did Sally fall off the swing set? because she had no arms. --- Knock, Knock Whos there? Not Sally.

why did javonne choose club getaway madonna wanted to foster

The 80's called. They need their couch back.

A blond walked into a bar. A guy picker her up and then they had sex.

What's worse than The Holocaust? Nothing, The Holocaust was a dark and scary time.

Kinky = using a feather Perverted = using the whole chicken Weird = using chicken bones Downright disgusting = all of the above, plus a cat

What's been hit millions of times? A woman married to an abusive husband.

Two guys are walking on a bridge. One has long hair. The other does not care.

A plane crashes in a polish cemetery the authorities have found 2000 bodies

When life gives you lemons, you make lemonade. Well, that's going to be some horrible lemonade if life doesn't also give you water and sugar.

Have you seen Ray Charles' new house? Neither has he...

Q. What happened to the girl who locked her keys in her car? A. I raped her.

Roses are red, Violets are red, Tulips are red, Dandelions are red, I lit your garden on fire.

What's brown and sticky? A black man covered in syrup.

what's hotter than my cousin's girlfriend? I don't know. she's remarkably hot. like, one of the hottest people I personally know.

A duck walks into a bar. The bartender asks " What'll You Have" The duck doesn't respond because it's a duck.

Why did the wolf cry boy? Cause he was a pedifile.

Why did the black man take the watermelon? Because he bought it, and watermelons are delicious.

Salt: "Hi there!" Slug: "AAÀAAAAAAAAAGGGHHHHH!!!" *dies*

Why are Black Guys Black? Migration and adaptation to the harsh heat of the southern Sahara Desert. DUH.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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