Did you here about the guy who kidnapped Liam Neeson's daughter? Well, he died

what did the chinese man say to the convicts at the side of the road? so long gay boys what did the convicts do to the chinese man? nothing he was in a car

There is a horse sitting at a bar, and the bartender says MOTHER OF GOD!! What is this horse doing in here?!

what's the best way to remove leaves from a tree? take them off

A bear walks into a bar. The bear is then shot by the bartender with the shotgun kept under the counter.

CAOIMHIN JUST BE QUITE

What more orange that a lime? Most things.

What do you call the man with no arms or legs, swimming in the bay? Bob.

What do you call a guy with a rainbow tuxedo on? A classy man that is very well dressed

What's the difference between a Boy Scout and a Jew? One comes back from camp.

What was Helen Keller's favourite colour? None, due her disability she was unable to see colours...

Three Blondes were walking when they come upon some tracks. The first blonde says they're deer tracks. The second blonde says they're elk tracks. The last blonde says they're moose tracks. While they are all arguing about what type of tracks they are, they get hit by a train.

A horse walks into a bar, the bartender asks "Why the long face?". The horse being a horse and doesnt understand english is confused and scared by its surroundings it gallops away knocking over a few tables.

Sigh, everybody in the world hates me :( Moral: Seven billion people? Realy?

I wonder what mute people say to themselves. :/

Why did Hitler kill himslef? He saw his gas bills.

why did bob eat the cookie? because he was hungry

There was a blonde driving a car but she was late to a meeting so she started speeding but then a police officer pulls her over. The officer asked the blonde "Do you know how fast you were going?" to which the blonde responded "Yes, I am late to a meeting" so the police gives a ticket for speeding and she ends up going late to her meeting.

Why didn't the boy go to the bathroom? His mother was taking a well deserved bath.

What do you call a dear with no eyes? A no-idear

Knock knock. Who's there? The Gestapo.

Lololol

What do you call a man with a Club approaching a Seal Very Strong considering he can hold a building

A muslim walks onto a plane. He goes to 13C as that is his seat designated on his ticket.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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