Why did the pedophile cross the road? To molest a child.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Tank tank who? You're welcome

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What would a gay, transgender, mexican man say to another? We could have butt sex.

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Confucius says, I hear and I forget. I see and I remember. I do and I understand.

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What's worse than aids? Being a virgin.

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knock knock. who's there? doctor. doctor who? doctor: you have cancer.

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I had vodka + water and got drunk. had rum + water and got drunk. had gin and water and still got drunk. I've learnt my lesson. NO MORE WATER FOR ME

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What is brown and can't get an erection? Poo

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Who looks like Bill Cosby, Smells like Bill Cosby, But isn't Bill Cosby? An imposter who should be sent to jail.

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How do you make a cripple cry Cut of his legs, THEN telll him a joke

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what has 8 legs, is brown, and will bite you? my crap

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How do you confuse a blond? Paint your self green and throw forks at her.

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The one under this is a fake. i wrote the real one

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three white men are running after a black man,, the black man is winning the race

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What's the difference between a Jew and a boy scout? The boy scout comes home from camp

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Because the tractor hadn't seen the chicken.

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what did the guy say when he lost his sandwich? wheres my sandwich?

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Yo mama so fat, her Patronus is a cake.

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a jew, a gay, and an irishman walk int a bar at different times during the span of 5 hours.

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Mary had a little lamb, The nurse and midwife fainted. Because last year she met a ram, And they got too acquainted.

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How do you steal from a sushi buffet? You say please.

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Pickup line: Hey babe, do you know what time it is? Because I don't wanna be late for class and if you told the time, it will surely help me because I'll be able to arrive early at my class not to mention it would greatly improve my punctuality efforts to help me pass the class this semester. Geez, I remember back in middle school there was a guy name Billy Jones and he used to always be late for class. His name was Billy but we called him Bill. Bill was his nickname but his real name was Billy. Anyways, he was always late for class because he would always make the best barbecue ribs in town.... (45 minutes later...) ....and I told Bill, "Man, if you were to just ask what time it was it would greatly help you in arriving to class early." And he was was like "I know but..."And then I cut him off and I said "But nothing. I don't care what kind of barbecue ribs you make, you just can't do that." So there I was, me and him, sitting down and .... (3 hours later...) ...it was awesome. Boy, I remember back in the early 90's when I was at elementary school, it was a stormy weather and we had to go to class. That's when I met Clarissa. She was a really nice girl and I remember there was a time when... (to be continued....)

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A banker makes some poor economic investments with other people's money. turns out the people can never get the money back. the banker walks away like nothing happened. the government does nothing to prosecute the man. Somewhere in there his wife leaves him.

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Joe: Hey, why are your counters all red and your blender looks broken? Me: The same reason why Mrs. Johnson's baby is missing. ajl

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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