What did Batman say to Robin to get in the car? Get in the car.

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A 16 year old boy and girl have unprotected sex. The girl becomes pregnant and decides to keep the baby. They both drop out of high school, get lots of government cheese, and the boy holds a steady job as manager at the local mcdonalds for the rest of his life.

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What is the best part about being a rapist? The orgasms.

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What do you call a gay dinosaur? Megasoreass What do you call a lesbian dinosaur? Lickalottapuss What dou you call a gay dinosaurs dog? Megasoreass Rex

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Roses are blurred Violets too I have astigmatism I cant see shit

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Roses are red Violets are blue Im bad with colours Nice T!ts

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Did you hear about the guy who fed his dog his baby? No Oh

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So you keep your knowledge sharp do you? When it comes to hypnosis and such?

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Why did the boy not get picked up from soccer? His mom was in a fatal car accident. His dad simply forgot.

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Why did the chicken attempt to cross the road? To see if it could.

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Q:How many cavemans does it take to screw in a lightbulb A: None there was no electricity back then

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What does a dog in a microwave look like? You tell me, I normally close my eyes when I masturbate ?_?

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Turkey Balls

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A lady in a bank was asked by the clerk to round the sum she wanted to raise from her account. She rounded it several times, but the clerk continued to insist that the sum needs to be rounded. She left the bank confused, with a coupon consisting of completely rounded sum of 691, 88$. Next day she returned with a coupon with a rounded sum of 690,88$. The clerk asked again the lady to round the sum. The lady started helplessly to cry and said she had rounded is already with a harp, and couldn't make it round anymore, she even removed the sharp 1 from the sum.

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A man walks into a bar. He goes up to the Bar Tender and says, "Hit me with all you got!" The bar tender then ducks down under the bar out of sight. He comes back up with a sledge hammer and viciously murders the man. Blood spews everywhere and many others are brutally murdered shortly afterwards. :)

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Q: What did the Goth-Punk girl write on her test for the question "What are three kinds of rock?" A: Igneous, Sedimentary, & Metamorphic, She is a 4.0 Geology Major attending a respectable University. She simply chooses to express herself through the musical and clothing trends that emerged in 1970's English underground music. In reality it her personal preferences in the aforementioned areas have no bearing on her intellectual or academic standing.

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What has a skinny head and specky? Josh Moran.

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Why did the man fail to enter the CAPTCHA phrase correctly? Because he was actually a bot, and bots are typically prohibited from accessing information on most public web sites.

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Did You Hear about the Black Guy That went to College?....Neither Did I...

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Your mama's so stupid she brought syrup to the quidditch world cup because she knew there would be quaffles!

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How many dead babies can you fit in an oven? Depends on if you put them in the blender first.

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hows your wife she died 7 years ago really mine too

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Are we in Tennessee? Because I recently saw on the side of the road that it was 10 miles to Memphis.

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What goes up and down but never physically moves? My grade.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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