How does micheal Jackson know when it's bed time? When the big hand touches the little hand.

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It's okay we all love you, except me, and everyone else.

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What's the difference between a dead baby and my dinner??? Nothing...

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why did the man shave his balls cause they were unnecessarily hairy

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Why did the man drive a van? So he could keep the stuff he stole.

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- Why does a kid from Chernobyl have two heads? - Because of the effects of the nuclear disaster that occurred there in 1986.

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Why did the clown go to jail? He murdered a thirteen-year-old girl.

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Why did the baby cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken.

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Doctor: Why the long face? Elephant Man: That's not my face that's a tumor.

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Who is the most famous black person? Michael Jackson, except he's not black.

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Q: why did Suzie drop her ice cream? A: because she got hit by a bus.. Q:knock knock who's there? A: not Suzie

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What did God say when he made the first black person? I have just added a significant element of diversity to the human species. Intolerance between ethnicities will surely prove to be an obstacle in societal progression, creating hardships for many. I know this because I am God.

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"What time is it?" "Time to buy a watch." The homeless man inquiring about the time proceeded to cry.

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What do you get when you cross a badger and a paper bag? The badger is cross of course but the bag is inanimate and can't be angered.

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Why cant Sally ride her bike? Because she has ceribal pausly

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What came first? The chicken or the egg? The egg, because breakfast comes before dinner.

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What's the difference between a dead baby and a tire iron? I've never forcibly expelled three tire irons from my vagina.

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Q: What do you get when a black man dates a white lady? A: A perfectly acceptable relationship.

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Mike lost his arms in a car accident. Knock knock Who's there? Not Mike.

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What's purple and fuzzy? A piece of purple fuzz.

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Why is Barney green and purple? Because the producers of the show decided to make him that way.

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Why did the fat girl stop eating? She wasn't hungry.

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Why was the boy scared? Well, his mother had recently taken up Satanical ideals and in an attempt to sacrifice themselves to the Dark Lord, she drove her car off a cliff and into a lake. Now, with his dead mother in the drivers seat, no way to call emergency services, and 300 feet of water between him and the surface, you can see why he'd be scared.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Ken. Can I some and use your toilet, I really need a shit.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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