What happened to the guy who took more lineage then he should have? He went to sleep.

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Why did Susie drop her ice cream? Because she got hit by a bus. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Susie.

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What do skeet disks and Jewish babies have in common? Hitler used to shoot them out of the sky.

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What do you get when you cross a cow with an elephant? A deformed organism

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Whats worse than getting raped by a cow? Getting raped by two cows.

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What has one head, three eyes and seven legs? A cow with a tri-pod rammed up it's arse. The third eye is a result of a birth defect.

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Knock Knock!! Who's there? The Bailiffs, now get out.

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why did the chicken cross the road? To get away from the sadistic farmer with a loaded shotgun (as the farmer has an extremely large score to settle with the chicken, as his wife was dead, a cause of mad cow disease, an STD from the chicken, as the chicken is a pimp) thus escaping captivity and starting a new life as a free chicken. God save Martin Luther KIng

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Do you know what one golf ball said to the other? Nothing they are lifeless objects

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Variants: :) I will always assist you in whatever you want. :( I want to kill you all by myself! Sense? Non? Fuck? Mind? Fission Mailed? Impossible Mission.

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whats long, orange, and comes out of brown stuff? -a carrot.

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Yo momma was so ugly that everybody died.

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Do you know what the forest fire got for Christmas? Your house

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Why did Jane break up with DeShawn? Cause they grew apart

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A man walks into a bar, he sits down.

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A man carrying a bucket of golf clubs walks into a bar with a blonde, a brunette, and an asian. His name was Tiger Woods.

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Why did the black man get fired? In this economy businesses are downsizing and outsourcing jobs for cheaper labor.

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whats worse than getting hit whit a baseball? getting hit by a train

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What's orange and sounds like a parrot? An orange parrot

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What did the frat guy drink after he lifted? A various assortment of beverages that were chilled at a cool 66 degrees.

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What's black, white and red all over? A race war

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Your moms so dumb that she has cancer..... wait thats racist

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Q. What's the difference between a clock and an elephant? A. A clock doesn't have limbs, muscles or a respiratory system.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Why the long face?" The horse says, "I have fetal alcohol syndrome."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops